Twas the last week of Fantasy and all we could hear,
Was Dan at the draft drinking a mug full of beer.
He will play Hittner whose moves have been so smart to the last,
It's just a shame that when he wins AD's such an ass.
Last week they got their wins over Death and Stilt,
Who after their upsets should be proud of the teams they had built.
Those wins came over the strong Alec and Titus,
Whose emails sounded like they may want to fight us.
Pride to the players of the playoffs they reached,
The feat is not easy just ask Chucky Peach.
His wide receivers were as good as they come,
But he drafted a Manning first which we all know was dumb.
Kirby's team was quite strong and could hit like a blitz,
Though he still wasn't happy so he traded with Pitz.
He got Anquan Boldin for that quarterback Vick,
Looking back now he must feel like a dick.
Lars, Jason, and Will round out the rest,
These 3 teams by no means could be called the best.
Their draft, moves and trades were all really lame,
Who cares about these losers lets talk championship game.
Now Arian! Now Jamaal! Now Lloyd, now Green-Ellis!
On Wallace! On Roddy! on Cedric, on Peyton Hillis!
What quarterbacks to start? Whatever will they do?
Dan start CJ2K! AD play Maurice Jones-Drew!
AD's defense is the Giants of New York,
Hes hoping Justin Tucks hits have all kinds of torque.
Dan's d is up north where they serve chowder,
He should be in good shape thanks to Vince Wilfork's power.
Matt Bryant's been solid a good kicker indeed,
Dan has a question mark will he really start Jeff Reed?
Were reaching the finish, the end of the race,
Wait we cant end the poem what about 3rd place?
The winner gets money so this is still a fight,
Both players will be glued to their tvs on Monday Night!
Drew Brees goes to Atlanta to take on Matt Ryan,
If Pierre Thomas goes crazy you will see Death crying.
Td's will be scored by Steven Jackson, maybe Kevin Boss,
Brandon Marshall and Andre Johnson should also grab a toss.
Too many players to list so I will skip the rest,
I just hope for a point from poor Javhid Best!
There is another game that features Pitz and Jason,
They play each other in the final of consolation.
How much trash will they talk maybe even a bet?
Make it a good one and well care about this game yet!
It would seem they do have it better then Alec this season,
He still watches those Redskins, I just don't see the reason.
Titus had a few rough weeks and might have grown a twitch,
How many times can that guy scream "son of a bitch"?
I want to include more about Lars but what do I say?
The guy is so quiet did he just get up and go away?
Will is excited for next year, he starts it off with the number one pick!
Just don't take advice from Peach, he made his way too quick.
So much excitement to come in the one last week of fantasy,
I'm so happy we'll all be in Bethesda drinking a Boh 40!
It's been a great season so lets enjoy this holiday right,
Happy Christmas to all, now lets get drunk Sunday Night!
Editor's note* So I came up with the idea to do this poem during the week of Thanksgiving! I had been counting down the weeks making sure I didn't skip the Xmas week of games. I get online to read one of my favorite ESPN columnists, DJ Gallo, only to see he he posted this on Monday! Oh well. Great minds think alike right? Now time to break down the main match ups.
White Rice vrs The Heaphopopotamus
On Sunday I went home to Pasadena after working the Ravens game to watch my nephew meet Santa for the first time. In case you're wondering he cried his ass off the entire time St. Nick was there. On my way back up 695 I was doing the mental math, "if he gets 10 points from New England's d, then I need 20 points a piece from Woodhead and Welker. Maybe Woodhead busts an early run, or Welker gets to return punts and scores." Countless examples I'm creating in my head until I hear on the radio "Dan Carpenter misses a potential 40 yard game tying field goal. It was one of his four misses on the day." FOUR!?!? FOUR?!?!? HE MISSED FOUR?!?!?! Now I cant wrap my mind around this at all. This guy carried me this year. He should be going to the Pro Bowl. Did they get blocked? Was he kicking from 70 yards out? Is he missing a foot? Wait a minute, am I now driving down 97 south? DAMNIT DAN CARPENTER! That's right. I was so confused over my kicker that I had gotten off 695 and taken 97 south all the way back to 100 on my way back to Baltimore. I kinda hope that story describes my Sunday.
Early on in the week I was hoping for Kyle Orton to get benched mid game putting Dan at a huge disadvantage, well unfortunately the Broncos announced they would start Tebow and gave Dan plenty of time to adjust. The selection of Kerry Collins proved to pay dividends for Dan as the gray haired quarterback put up 16.28 points against Houston's terrible defense. That was just one of the many double digit scorers Dan had. Even though Arian Foster was held in check (6.10 points) CJ2K had 19.7 and Cedric Benson scored 21.0 points. Thanks Cleveland. I no longer take you seriously. Dan didn't need much more help after that. Death only had 3 players crack the double digit mark (Brees, Sjax, Brandon Marshall). I have already vented about Dan Carpenter, but I was pretty thrilled to see Pittsburgh's defense look terrible against the Jets. Putting aside all Ravens bias, did anyone see Mark Sanchez going that game with out a pick 6? Anyone? Rex Ryan and his crazy foot fetish both thought Mark was due for 3-4 dumb plays that would have scored points for me. And then there is Jahvid. Jahvid, Jahvid, Jahvid.....1.20 points. WHY CAN'T I QUIT YOU???? Shame the underdog run came to an end this week, would have been nice if it was at least competitive. Dan rolls easily to championship.
BlairWhiteProject vs ProtectYourNeck
nephew w/out the n vs Just the Tip Drill
Yea, you only one paragraph for both your games, since I'm pretty sure Peach and Kirby didn't care about these match ups at all this weekend. Jason though does seem to care, really random time to do so, but good for him since his team has caught fire since they have been ruled out of playoff contention. 6 of Jason's 9 players scored at least double digits, and he rolled all over Peach and set himself up with a spot in the consolation championship (which means nothing). Pitz secured his place in the championship after winning the "Irony Bowl" where Mike Vick scored 40 points, which would have been more then 50% of what Kirby scored this week. Every week when I do this blog I point out two things, 1) Pitz trade rapped Kirby and 2) Peyton was a dumb pick. Both of those teams lost the non playoff bracket. No surprise. One last thing for Peach, is it just me or the more and more you read his trash talk of "Damn, Peyton was a terrible first pick" does it start to sound less and less sarcastic and more and more regretful? Jason and Pitz come up with a good bet so we will give two shits about this game next week. PLEEEEEEASE.
Gunners Treble vrs crash and burn
The match up for who has the worst team in the league. Congrats Lars, its you. Shocker neither team could break 62 points. Well at least Will gets the number one pick, Lars just has a shitty team and drafts 3rd. You both suck, just in case you didn't know.
Do You Like Apples? vrs Motor Boaters
As I mentioned earlier I had a lot going on Sunday and unfortunately wasn't able to watch the games at all. What I was able to do is pay attention to the Around the League updates being played at M and T Bank stadium The first one I saw was a TD pass from Matt Ryan to Micheal Jenkins. 4 points for Stilt. After that, well I feel like every highlight I saw featured somebody on AD's team. Well, when I say someone I mean Jamaal Charles. 21.3 points tied Jamaal as the top scorer in this match up with another player on AD's team, Jon Kitna. Kitna was a hot commodity this week as our top two seeds both had quarterback issues. Had Dan been able to get him Stilt may have just been able to pull off a victory this week. Sorry buddy. Regardless of who else was available on the wire Hittner was going to start Maclin and White. And why wouldn't he? 15.9 for Jeremy and 12.5 for Rowdy Roddy made up the foursome that was able to lock this game up for the number two seed. I will say this for Stilt, unlike the Commish he was able to make this a bit of a match up. Matt Ryan, Andre Johnson, Kevin Boss and Rashard Mendenhall all scored over 11 points. Include the 12 points he got from the Jets defense in a big win over the Steelers and the 16 he got from Robbie Gould on Monday night and Stilt did have a pretty good week. Pretty good doesn't get you to the championship however. AD on the other hand will be going there, and that was after pedestrian performances from MJD, Peyton Hillis and Vernon Davis. Should be a great championship match.
Down to the last 3 games of the season (sorry, but the 9th place game doesn't count at all). One of which is pointless, one is for a few bucks, the other is for EVERYTHING! Games start tonight and I will leave you some advice in the words of the greatest Christmas song ever written! It's appropriately from "Twas the Night Before Christmas", you know the movie with the mice and the clock? If not watch it! Anyway.....
"...we'll do what's necessary cause, even a miracle needs a hand".
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Friday, December 17, 2010
Week 14 Recap
So the playoffs are intense! I mean who wasn't sitting on the edge of their seats when Derrick Mason caught his second touchdown pass of the night and brought Will within 75 points of Pitz? But seriously, playoff fantasy football is so vicious that it has lead to the divorce of Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson. Do you realize how big of a deal this is? Weren't they the it couple of Hollywood? Actually I'm asking at this point. Didn't even know they were married until I logged in to Yahoo just to check the scores. The only thing I knew about Johansson's love life was that she was supposed to have a late brunch or early breakfast with Vinny Chase about 6 season's ago. I assume Vince banged her and they called it a day. Speaking of calling it a day, I was debating back and forth about who I need to give attention to this week as far as playoffs go, since 4 teams didn't play, and 4 teams played meaningless games. So this is what I'm going to do. I'll throw a few bones out to the losers bracket, then give my breakdown of the 2 biggest games in our young league's history.
- Jason Pack was the highest scorer of the week. That means that regardless of who he played he would have won. Nobody scored more points this week then Jason. I keep repeating this because I don't believe what I'm typing. Could he actually be a player we need to worry about next year?
- Jason on Sunday night tried to get Pitz to trade him Micheal Vick for his first round pick. "No? Ok then how about my first round pick AND Joe Flacco? No? Why not? I want Vick! Still no? Fine, way to be selfish and not help anyone out." I don't think I'm worried about Jason as much.
- Larsen (not in playoffs) could have beaten Alec (number 4 seed) with 3 players; Micheal Turner (30.4), Brian Westbrook (17.0), and Matt Hasselback (13.7). Larsen lost to Jason. These two do know it is a little late to take this seriously now right?
- I don't think anyone has cared less about a game ever then how our entire league felt about Will vrs Pitz. Can Derrick Mason make up this 59 point deficit on Monday Night Football? No.
- I grow bored with the losers bracket very very quickly. Time to talk about real teams now....
The Heaphopapotamus vrs Grundy Grabbers - SUCK IT ALEC! Nobody runs their mouth more and produces less than the Grundy Grabbers (true fact I just made up)! Death's imaginary defense was strong again this week as Adrian Peterson was held to only 2.6 points making this week a cake walk. A week ago Peterson was good for 28. Tommy Touchdown and Reggie Wayne made their presence known, scoring a combined 33.36 points. For those of you scoring at home, yes that is 55.6% of his total points. Ouch. You could have added atleast 6 more to that total, if it wasnt for this play by Blair White. That total was almost passed by Pittsburgh's defense, aka the biggest mistake everyone else in the league made that did not pick them up. It sucks to watch Polamalu running back touchdowns when all I want is to see Pittsburgh lose, but remember I have been running with the Chief's defense most of the year. I'll take the upgrade. While there are others who have higher total points, I'm not looking to upgrade at the QB position. Drew Brees is a stud. I decided to look it up, and his worst week ever this year is week 4 where he scored just over 14 points. That was his worst week! Drew has only chucked up 25plus points one week, but I can pencil him in for a solid 15-17 on a weekly basis. As sad as it is to say I might get my second 25 plus this weekend if the Ravens play anything like they did in Houston (more on that later). I will say though that it was great to see good triumph over evil once again. Alec we all hate you, and I'm glad I'm the reason your eliminated. Danny Woodhead for life!
Velour Fog vrs Motor Boaters - Hi everyone, my name is RunDMC. I know I know, it seemed like I wasn't going to live up to expectations again this year, but my nickname is too cool not be talked about more often. So I said to myself "Run, what are we doing? We need to be killing it every week. Putting up the big numbers. I mean people want to draft Cedric Benson over us in fantasy football. COME ON MAN!" And thus the Play off miracle of how Titus won his first playoff game behind 38.9 points from RunDMC. Or at least so all of us thought going to bed on Sunday night. Well I was actually thinking about how scared I was of Adrian Peterson, but that's not the point. Going into the two Monday night games Titus was up 80.94 to 56.28. Titus had his first overall pick Ray Rice going, and Stilt had his first overall pick Andre Johnson, who Stilt took with Rice still on the board, and Brandon Jacobs (how many different teams have had this guy btw? how many different teams hate him now btw?). Well Jacobs had himself a day scoring 17.6 points, all of a sudden making this a closer contest. Then the Mano y Mano match up of first round picks. Andre Johnson vrs Ray Rice. Well at this point everyone knows what happened. Ray does everything but scores a touchdown and brings home 12.0 points giving Titus 92.94 points (2nd most among playoff contenders). We also know that Ed Reed forgot how to play defense on Monday and allowed Andre Johnson to score 26.0 points and giving Stilt 99.88 for the win! Back to Ed Reed for a second, that was honestly the worst game I've ever seen him play. Every Andre Johnson highlight you can see Ed just completely lost. On the last touchdown before the 2pt conversion you can see Ed actually defending the back pylon and nothing else. As angry as we all were that this happend I can just picture Titus sounding a lot like this.
So here we are the Final Four. Dan, Hittner, Death, Stilt. The bye's verses the underdogs. Dan and Death battle which is a pretty nice rivalry given the history, where as I don't know if Stilt and AD have met. I'm actually really interested in hearing who everyone is rooting for or against this week. I know Alec is rooting against me, but thats just cause hes a jealous hater with girl hair. Does everyone want the Jedi showdown of Dan and Hittner? Are you rooting for the 5 vrs 6 seed where Mark Reynolds would go agaisnt his Community Relations counterpart (too much?)? Maybe you want to shake it up. Dan would love to see an all SPY swimming final with him and Stilt (and beating me along the way would give him brain porn for a long time). What about an all Towson Track/Killa Beez match up with Death and AD? Maybe you just hate all of us at this point and have decided to quit playing fantasy football altogether (Titus)? Either way this week is going to be very exciting. Like I haven't been this excited for anything since I heard about the lesbian scene featuring Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis in the new movie "The Black Swan".
Until next time always remember if the Airplane you're on gives you the option between steak or fish, always take the lasagna.
- Jason Pack was the highest scorer of the week. That means that regardless of who he played he would have won. Nobody scored more points this week then Jason. I keep repeating this because I don't believe what I'm typing. Could he actually be a player we need to worry about next year?
- Jason on Sunday night tried to get Pitz to trade him Micheal Vick for his first round pick. "No? Ok then how about my first round pick AND Joe Flacco? No? Why not? I want Vick! Still no? Fine, way to be selfish and not help anyone out." I don't think I'm worried about Jason as much.
- Larsen (not in playoffs) could have beaten Alec (number 4 seed) with 3 players; Micheal Turner (30.4), Brian Westbrook (17.0), and Matt Hasselback (13.7). Larsen lost to Jason. These two do know it is a little late to take this seriously now right?
- I don't think anyone has cared less about a game ever then how our entire league felt about Will vrs Pitz. Can Derrick Mason make up this 59 point deficit on Monday Night Football? No.
- I grow bored with the losers bracket very very quickly. Time to talk about real teams now....
The Heaphopapotamus vrs Grundy Grabbers - SUCK IT ALEC! Nobody runs their mouth more and produces less than the Grundy Grabbers (true fact I just made up)! Death's imaginary defense was strong again this week as Adrian Peterson was held to only 2.6 points making this week a cake walk. A week ago Peterson was good for 28. Tommy Touchdown and Reggie Wayne made their presence known, scoring a combined 33.36 points. For those of you scoring at home, yes that is 55.6% of his total points. Ouch. You could have added atleast 6 more to that total, if it wasnt for this play by Blair White. That total was almost passed by Pittsburgh's defense, aka the biggest mistake everyone else in the league made that did not pick them up. It sucks to watch Polamalu running back touchdowns when all I want is to see Pittsburgh lose, but remember I have been running with the Chief's defense most of the year. I'll take the upgrade. While there are others who have higher total points, I'm not looking to upgrade at the QB position. Drew Brees is a stud. I decided to look it up, and his worst week ever this year is week 4 where he scored just over 14 points. That was his worst week! Drew has only chucked up 25plus points one week, but I can pencil him in for a solid 15-17 on a weekly basis. As sad as it is to say I might get my second 25 plus this weekend if the Ravens play anything like they did in Houston (more on that later). I will say though that it was great to see good triumph over evil once again. Alec we all hate you, and I'm glad I'm the reason your eliminated. Danny Woodhead for life!
Velour Fog vrs Motor Boaters - Hi everyone, my name is RunDMC. I know I know, it seemed like I wasn't going to live up to expectations again this year, but my nickname is too cool not be talked about more often. So I said to myself "Run, what are we doing? We need to be killing it every week. Putting up the big numbers. I mean people want to draft Cedric Benson over us in fantasy football. COME ON MAN!" And thus the Play off miracle of how Titus won his first playoff game behind 38.9 points from RunDMC. Or at least so all of us thought going to bed on Sunday night. Well I was actually thinking about how scared I was of Adrian Peterson, but that's not the point. Going into the two Monday night games Titus was up 80.94 to 56.28. Titus had his first overall pick Ray Rice going, and Stilt had his first overall pick Andre Johnson, who Stilt took with Rice still on the board, and Brandon Jacobs (how many different teams have had this guy btw? how many different teams hate him now btw?). Well Jacobs had himself a day scoring 17.6 points, all of a sudden making this a closer contest. Then the Mano y Mano match up of first round picks. Andre Johnson vrs Ray Rice. Well at this point everyone knows what happened. Ray does everything but scores a touchdown and brings home 12.0 points giving Titus 92.94 points (2nd most among playoff contenders). We also know that Ed Reed forgot how to play defense on Monday and allowed Andre Johnson to score 26.0 points and giving Stilt 99.88 for the win! Back to Ed Reed for a second, that was honestly the worst game I've ever seen him play. Every Andre Johnson highlight you can see Ed just completely lost. On the last touchdown before the 2pt conversion you can see Ed actually defending the back pylon and nothing else. As angry as we all were that this happend I can just picture Titus sounding a lot like this.
So here we are the Final Four. Dan, Hittner, Death, Stilt. The bye's verses the underdogs. Dan and Death battle which is a pretty nice rivalry given the history, where as I don't know if Stilt and AD have met. I'm actually really interested in hearing who everyone is rooting for or against this week. I know Alec is rooting against me, but thats just cause hes a jealous hater with girl hair. Does everyone want the Jedi showdown of Dan and Hittner? Are you rooting for the 5 vrs 6 seed where Mark Reynolds would go agaisnt his Community Relations counterpart (too much?)? Maybe you want to shake it up. Dan would love to see an all SPY swimming final with him and Stilt (and beating me along the way would give him brain porn for a long time). What about an all Towson Track/Killa Beez match up with Death and AD? Maybe you just hate all of us at this point and have decided to quit playing fantasy football altogether (Titus)? Either way this week is going to be very exciting. Like I haven't been this excited for anything since I heard about the lesbian scene featuring Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis in the new movie "The Black Swan".
Until next time always remember if the Airplane you're on gives you the option between steak or fish, always take the lasagna.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Week 13 Recap
All I wanted to do was talk about the really exciting really close game that put/eliminated one of us from the playoffs, and there wasn't one match up that was worth breaking down. Sorry, but Peach getting crushed on Monday night is hardly worth me dedicating an entire blog to. Instead I think I'm going to go another route. Right now would be a perfect time to reflect upon quite the enjoyable season. Some can do it positively, some with regret. In reverse order I'm going to go team by team and guess what each owner is thinking right now.
crash and burn - will - 2-11 - In all honesty this record would probably be a win or two better had he not traded Rodgers, but by no means was this a good team. In the last game of the regular season crash and burn had lost with Death still waiting to play Welker and Woodhead on Monday night. Twice this season Will set the record for least amount of points scored in a week. So how did he get here? Will came into the draft thinking "I want to leave with Aaron Rodgers", and hot damn he did. Unfortunately for Will he still needed to draft 14 more players, whoops, wasn't prepared for that. Will's second round pick is partly my fault. He asked my opinion and I told him "if Steven Jackson hadn't fallen to me, I was looking very seriously at drafting DeAngelo Williams". I was quite honest, but that is quite the swing in good fortune. His next two picks were wide recivers Miles Austin (solid pick) and Sidney Rice (OOOOOOH, wait....he's not the guy thats going to be injured all year is he?) When two of your top four picks spend more time on the PUP and IR well you cant be surprised that you are in last. On a positive spin for Will, he does have Rodgers coming back next year and the number one pick for next season. So thats nice.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - 4-9 - Ugh. I want to bash this team so bad, but I just can't. 5 weeks ago, would you have thought this team would have had 4 wins? Remember in the middle of the season when Jason wouldn't even start full teams? I really want to rip his draft, but HE WASN'T THERE. That's probably what Jason is regretting more then anything else going into next season. Here's the weird thing. His team won the last 3 games he has played, and he has only made 13 moves this season. I'm not really sure what to make of Jason as a player. He could be someone to watch for next year, seeing as how he basically paid out $50 to experiment with fantasy football. He could also just have been really lucky over the last 3 weeks. Once thing that will be fun to see is how well he drafts next year, you know assuming I have been feeding him Svedka for 3 hours before his first pick and I convince him to give me the #2 overall pick for my 6th rounder and a bottle of vodka.
Gunners Treble - Lars - 4-9 - That's right. Not only did you tie Jason for the second worst record, but you ended up with the worse of the two draft picks. That is going to be a problem for Lars because if you look at how he drafted this year you can see he needs all the help he can get. Micheal Turner was a good pick. I have no argument there...but listen to the next 6; Larry Fitzgerald, Ryan Mathews, Joseph Addai, Vincent Jackson, Jermicheal Finley, Philly's D. Unlucky? At times. Poor decision making? Yeah, that too. Lars' draft did have one move that had everyone impressed, he did not take a QB until his last two picks. He had drafted Brett Favre before Favre had even decided to play. Gutsy, and at first it looked genius, then around week 3 it seemed pretty dumb. Lars will have an early pick next year, but looking up and down his team you have to wonder who are his keepers going to be?
Just the Tip Drill - Pitz - 5-8 - Did you ever think that by the end of the season that we wouldn't be able to laugh at Pitz and Jason? Makes me sad. Well unlike Jason, Pitz did do something to better his team. He brought in Micheal Vick when Vick was still a huge question mark, upgraded his draft for next year, and got rid of all of his Bengals and Cardinals which has to be good for something. This week Pitz handled Titus and moved him out of his cushy first round bye. He had big games from Vick (29.88), Branch (12.4) and Jones (10.7). The best part? Not one player Pitz started this week was on his roster week 1. Gotta know when to sell right?
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - 5-8 - All season long we made fun of Pitz's team, and praised Kirby's. Oh don't worry Kirby will be fine, its just bad luck. Well they ended with the same record. Guess he really did have bad luck this year. Kirby early on in the season rode the hot hand of Mike Vick, little did he know that was his team's MVP. The tandem of Eli Manning and Donovan McNabb just haven't been able to fill the void that Vick left on this team. Trading away his second round pick probably wont help his cause in reaching the postseason next year.
TheBlairWhiteProject - Peach - 6-7 - Hmmmm. What did this team do wrong? Strange. Seemed to do everything right. How did he not make the playoffs? What did he do? What did he do?
MotorBoaters - Stilt - 7-6 - Crazy last couple of weeks. This team was 6-1 going into week 8, then proceeded to drop its next 5 games! Matty Ice must have had a few games on the road. In Stilt's defense I don't know if there is a team who had to deal with as many injuries as he had to all year. Taking a look at his first 6 draft picks (Andre Johnson, Rashad Mendenhall, Pierre Thomas, Dallas Clark, Greg Jennings, Pierre Garcon) all but Mendenhall have dealt with some kind of injury throughout the season. I think that should be expected though if your going to draft numerous players named "Pierre". Well the team is starting to look as healthy as it can be (Clark is on the IR, and a different team) and ready to make a playoff run. Kinda fun to start talking about teams who did things right!
TheHeaphopapotamus - Death - 8-5 - Solid first two picks in Drew Brees and Steven Jackson, but after that there wasn't much help. Brandon Marshall and Jahvid Best are still on the team, but other then Todd Heap (who was his last pick in the draft. Not just a clever name) no other player he drafted is left on the roster. This team is a good example of how you can build a winning team through waiver wire and free agency, along with knowing right match ups (most of the time at least). Did anyone notice the upgrade to Pittsburgh's D? Thanks Jason!
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - 8-5 - Took two great talents in Adrian Peterson and Tom Brady who both slipped in the draft, and Alec has had a very good first season of fantasy football. He hit on other draft picks like Percy Harvin and Santonio Holmes. Has hit a bit of a hiccup right now as he has lost his last 4 games. I personally expect him to make that 5 in a row after this week. No reason to talk any more about this bitch ass.
Velour Fog - Titus - 9-4 - 2 game losing streak. What happended to all the good teams going into the final stretch? For Titus it would appear that his gem pick up of RunDMC (second best nickname in football, its why I can never write "Darren McFadden") has started to slow down, and we all know that Ray Rice gets lost on his way to the endzone. Know who doesn't get lost looking for the endzone? MEGATRON (best nickname in football, hands down). Calvin Johnson has been a beast, and kind of a steal in the 3rd round. Include Philip Rivers (2nd round) and Matt Forte (4th round) and there is no question in my opinion that Titus had the best first 4 rounds of the draft.
Do You Like Apples?? - Hittner - 9-4 - Aaron Rodgers, Peyton Hillis, Jeremy Maclin. What do these three players all have in common? They all start for the hottest team in the league right now, and none of them were drafted by Bill Murphy. That's right, Hittner is the second overall seed and didn't even draft his own team. Might be time to find another excuse there Jason. Hittner has killed the waiver wire all season ending up with other supporting players like BenJarvus Green-Ellis (yes he will be known as the Law Firm from now on in this blog), Stevie "Hands of God" Johnson (please notice that his name is Stevie, and not Steve), and even to a lesser extent Micheal Crabtree (I don't have a cute nickname or really needed to mention Crabtree, but I really wanted to name 3 players). Ok this is running long, just know Hittner's team is going to win.
White Rice - Dan - 11-2 - Just like Hittner, Dan took a decent draft and made himself a dominant team. Kyle Orton and Brandon Lloyd don't seem like much to get excited about initially, but the two of them have joined forces with Chris Johnson and Arian Foster to make this team the force that it has been. Unlike most teams backing into the playoffs Dan has still managed to run off 4 wins in a row and would appear to be ready for a strong playoff push. Earlier in the year I wrote a post about how Dan is similar to Darth Vader. Well right now I'm starting to wonder if Hittner might be Luke Skywalker. Stay with me. Hittner's team was no treat early on in the season, while Dan came out of the gates just destroying people. The two finally meet up in week 8, just like Luke and Vader meet in Empire Strikes Back. Dan won that match by cutting off Hittner's hand with a lightsaber (this is 100% factual). So now you get the feeling that while the rest of us battle (think of Titus as Han Solo and Stilt as Boba Fett, and Alec is the Death Star and I'm Wedge Antilles, oh yea I went there) the feeling has to be that the two Jedi will meet again ala Return of the Jedi. Only this time HITTNER is actually stronger, and is able to return Dan to the good side. Of course if CJ2K forgets to show up and the Denver offense starts to stall without Josh McDaniels, well then I will need to come up with a new movie correlation.
Well now that this post is done it's time to focus on the playoffs. After last nights game Titus has the big lead with 13 points coming from the right foot of Adam Vinatieri (so glad that I'm not typing about Reggie Wayne's huge day). It's put up or shut up time, or as Master Yoda says...."Do or do not. There is no try."
crash and burn - will - 2-11 - In all honesty this record would probably be a win or two better had he not traded Rodgers, but by no means was this a good team. In the last game of the regular season crash and burn had lost with Death still waiting to play Welker and Woodhead on Monday night. Twice this season Will set the record for least amount of points scored in a week. So how did he get here? Will came into the draft thinking "I want to leave with Aaron Rodgers", and hot damn he did. Unfortunately for Will he still needed to draft 14 more players, whoops, wasn't prepared for that. Will's second round pick is partly my fault. He asked my opinion and I told him "if Steven Jackson hadn't fallen to me, I was looking very seriously at drafting DeAngelo Williams". I was quite honest, but that is quite the swing in good fortune. His next two picks were wide recivers Miles Austin (solid pick) and Sidney Rice (OOOOOOH, wait....he's not the guy thats going to be injured all year is he?) When two of your top four picks spend more time on the PUP and IR well you cant be surprised that you are in last. On a positive spin for Will, he does have Rodgers coming back next year and the number one pick for next season. So thats nice.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - 4-9 - Ugh. I want to bash this team so bad, but I just can't. 5 weeks ago, would you have thought this team would have had 4 wins? Remember in the middle of the season when Jason wouldn't even start full teams? I really want to rip his draft, but HE WASN'T THERE. That's probably what Jason is regretting more then anything else going into next season. Here's the weird thing. His team won the last 3 games he has played, and he has only made 13 moves this season. I'm not really sure what to make of Jason as a player. He could be someone to watch for next year, seeing as how he basically paid out $50 to experiment with fantasy football. He could also just have been really lucky over the last 3 weeks. Once thing that will be fun to see is how well he drafts next year, you know assuming I have been feeding him Svedka for 3 hours before his first pick and I convince him to give me the #2 overall pick for my 6th rounder and a bottle of vodka.
Gunners Treble - Lars - 4-9 - That's right. Not only did you tie Jason for the second worst record, but you ended up with the worse of the two draft picks. That is going to be a problem for Lars because if you look at how he drafted this year you can see he needs all the help he can get. Micheal Turner was a good pick. I have no argument there...but listen to the next 6; Larry Fitzgerald, Ryan Mathews, Joseph Addai, Vincent Jackson, Jermicheal Finley, Philly's D. Unlucky? At times. Poor decision making? Yeah, that too. Lars' draft did have one move that had everyone impressed, he did not take a QB until his last two picks. He had drafted Brett Favre before Favre had even decided to play. Gutsy, and at first it looked genius, then around week 3 it seemed pretty dumb. Lars will have an early pick next year, but looking up and down his team you have to wonder who are his keepers going to be?
Just the Tip Drill - Pitz - 5-8 - Did you ever think that by the end of the season that we wouldn't be able to laugh at Pitz and Jason? Makes me sad. Well unlike Jason, Pitz did do something to better his team. He brought in Micheal Vick when Vick was still a huge question mark, upgraded his draft for next year, and got rid of all of his Bengals and Cardinals which has to be good for something. This week Pitz handled Titus and moved him out of his cushy first round bye. He had big games from Vick (29.88), Branch (12.4) and Jones (10.7). The best part? Not one player Pitz started this week was on his roster week 1. Gotta know when to sell right?
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - 5-8 - All season long we made fun of Pitz's team, and praised Kirby's. Oh don't worry Kirby will be fine, its just bad luck. Well they ended with the same record. Guess he really did have bad luck this year. Kirby early on in the season rode the hot hand of Mike Vick, little did he know that was his team's MVP. The tandem of Eli Manning and Donovan McNabb just haven't been able to fill the void that Vick left on this team. Trading away his second round pick probably wont help his cause in reaching the postseason next year.
TheBlairWhiteProject - Peach - 6-7 - Hmmmm. What did this team do wrong? Strange. Seemed to do everything right. How did he not make the playoffs? What did he do? What did he do?
MotorBoaters - Stilt - 7-6 - Crazy last couple of weeks. This team was 6-1 going into week 8, then proceeded to drop its next 5 games! Matty Ice must have had a few games on the road. In Stilt's defense I don't know if there is a team who had to deal with as many injuries as he had to all year. Taking a look at his first 6 draft picks (Andre Johnson, Rashad Mendenhall, Pierre Thomas, Dallas Clark, Greg Jennings, Pierre Garcon) all but Mendenhall have dealt with some kind of injury throughout the season. I think that should be expected though if your going to draft numerous players named "Pierre". Well the team is starting to look as healthy as it can be (Clark is on the IR, and a different team) and ready to make a playoff run. Kinda fun to start talking about teams who did things right!
TheHeaphopapotamus - Death - 8-5 - Solid first two picks in Drew Brees and Steven Jackson, but after that there wasn't much help. Brandon Marshall and Jahvid Best are still on the team, but other then Todd Heap (who was his last pick in the draft. Not just a clever name) no other player he drafted is left on the roster. This team is a good example of how you can build a winning team through waiver wire and free agency, along with knowing right match ups (most of the time at least). Did anyone notice the upgrade to Pittsburgh's D? Thanks Jason!
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - 8-5 - Took two great talents in Adrian Peterson and Tom Brady who both slipped in the draft, and Alec has had a very good first season of fantasy football. He hit on other draft picks like Percy Harvin and Santonio Holmes. Has hit a bit of a hiccup right now as he has lost his last 4 games. I personally expect him to make that 5 in a row after this week. No reason to talk any more about this bitch ass.
Velour Fog - Titus - 9-4 - 2 game losing streak. What happended to all the good teams going into the final stretch? For Titus it would appear that his gem pick up of RunDMC (second best nickname in football, its why I can never write "Darren McFadden") has started to slow down, and we all know that Ray Rice gets lost on his way to the endzone. Know who doesn't get lost looking for the endzone? MEGATRON (best nickname in football, hands down). Calvin Johnson has been a beast, and kind of a steal in the 3rd round. Include Philip Rivers (2nd round) and Matt Forte (4th round) and there is no question in my opinion that Titus had the best first 4 rounds of the draft.
Do You Like Apples?? - Hittner - 9-4 - Aaron Rodgers, Peyton Hillis, Jeremy Maclin. What do these three players all have in common? They all start for the hottest team in the league right now, and none of them were drafted by Bill Murphy. That's right, Hittner is the second overall seed and didn't even draft his own team. Might be time to find another excuse there Jason. Hittner has killed the waiver wire all season ending up with other supporting players like BenJarvus Green-Ellis (yes he will be known as the Law Firm from now on in this blog), Stevie "Hands of God" Johnson (please notice that his name is Stevie, and not Steve), and even to a lesser extent Micheal Crabtree (I don't have a cute nickname or really needed to mention Crabtree, but I really wanted to name 3 players). Ok this is running long, just know Hittner's team is going to win.
White Rice - Dan - 11-2 - Just like Hittner, Dan took a decent draft and made himself a dominant team. Kyle Orton and Brandon Lloyd don't seem like much to get excited about initially, but the two of them have joined forces with Chris Johnson and Arian Foster to make this team the force that it has been. Unlike most teams backing into the playoffs Dan has still managed to run off 4 wins in a row and would appear to be ready for a strong playoff push. Earlier in the year I wrote a post about how Dan is similar to Darth Vader. Well right now I'm starting to wonder if Hittner might be Luke Skywalker. Stay with me. Hittner's team was no treat early on in the season, while Dan came out of the gates just destroying people. The two finally meet up in week 8, just like Luke and Vader meet in Empire Strikes Back. Dan won that match by cutting off Hittner's hand with a lightsaber (this is 100% factual). So now you get the feeling that while the rest of us battle (think of Titus as Han Solo and Stilt as Boba Fett, and Alec is the Death Star and I'm Wedge Antilles, oh yea I went there) the feeling has to be that the two Jedi will meet again ala Return of the Jedi. Only this time HITTNER is actually stronger, and is able to return Dan to the good side. Of course if CJ2K forgets to show up and the Denver offense starts to stall without Josh McDaniels, well then I will need to come up with a new movie correlation.
Well now that this post is done it's time to focus on the playoffs. After last nights game Titus has the big lead with 13 points coming from the right foot of Adam Vinatieri (so glad that I'm not typing about Reggie Wayne's huge day). It's put up or shut up time, or as Master Yoda says...."Do or do not. There is no try."
Friday, December 3, 2010
Week 12 Recap
So its been a busy week. I get back into Baltimore Monday late afternoon after celebrating Thanksgiving and then going away hunting for four days. Tuesday night I had to go to Safeway, since I had no food, then met up with Kirby and Jen for a couple of hours. Last night I had dinner with the fam and then had to play Fifa with Dan (thanks Pitz!). I get home and realize that I'm watching a NFL game during week 13, AND HAVEN'T RECAPPED 12!!! Whoops. Well then I panic because I have nothing to write about anymore thanks to Pitz and Dan. So thinking of Dan I realized I only go to the Eastern Shore for 2 things; 1) to visit Dan/go to beach, and 2) TO KILL WILDLIFE! How are those two things even close to related? Crazy. Well that wasn't even the craziest thing that happened this week, and now I have something to write about.
- Steve Johnson dropped a pass that would have won the game for his team, blamed God and then was PRAISED by the media for being so stand up about the situation. Really? If this was 100 years ago and somebody blamed God for a mistake weren't they deemed a witch and burned at the stake? Also when did we start calling him Stevie Johnson? Was there an actual conversation when he went up to somebody and said, "Look, I'm 25 years old. This "Steve" business just isn't my style. Can you call me Stevie like when I was 7? Thanks"
- The same media that praised little Stevie, RIPPED Derek Anderson for laughing during a blow out and then storming off in a postgame interview. Did anyone hear how the whole thing played out? We counted, the person who asked Derek "Why were you laughing?" asked him 12 times before he lost his mind. 12! After the 7th time Derek should have been allowed to throw the podium at him, laugh more hysterically than the Joker and scream THIS IS WHY I'M LAUGHING!!! Why does the media get to be so high and mighty and judgmental? Such a joke.
- Andre Johnson and Cortland Finnegan got into an all out brawl where punches were thrown while the players helmets were off. Needless to say both were ejected. What was strange was that nobody was suspended and both players were fined $25,000. Now, a $25,000 fine would ruin my life no question, but this is way to small of a punishment. Don't get me wrong I loved watching Andre beat the crap out of Cortland (also of all the receivers in the NFL to start crap with you choose Andre Johnson, really Cortland?), but the $25,000 fine for those two was the same as James Harrison's fine for tackling the quarterback. NFL needs to figure this crap out.
- Going into week 13 there is a possibility that there will be 3 white starting running backs in the NFL (Peyton Hillis, Danny Woodhead, and Toby Gerhart) and nothing seems weird about it. They are all good, but when was the last time this happened, 1935? When were blacks allowed in the NFL? Peach get Stat Boy on the phone!!!!
- The Baltimore Ravens top pass rusher came out this week and said that quitting cocaine is the reason for his resurgent season. He also claimed it was a joke, and I do find it hilarious, but ummmm should somebody maybe drug test Fabian Washington?
- I am terrified of Will this weekend
- A holding call that nullified a Ray Rice touchdown affected 3 of us this week. Titus got the loss, Peach stayed in the playoff hunt, and I couldn't clinch my playoff spot. Seems like the only team it didn't seem to bother was the actual Baltimore Ravens.
- Qatar is smaller then Connecticut and yet will host the World Cup, because they can provide air conditioned stadiums. Russia will also get to host a World Cup four years prior to Qatar. Has there ever been two more dramatically different climates? Add South Africa to this mess and you have basically a shower where someone flushed a toilet. HOT, COLD, HOT!!! (Yes I know South Africa was actually cold at this WC, but come on that joke was gold!)
- One last World Cup point. England was credited with being the Birthplace of Football/Soccer and yet they haven't hosted a World Cup since 1966! I also enjoyed FIFA claiming that the possibility of making money (which the US had the greatest capacity to do of any potential host nation) was not a factor in their decision, and yet you could actually see the voters counting their Qatar money! You could tell it was from Cutter, I mean Qatar, because of the oil stains on each bit of currency. (I don't know if this is true, but it makes me feel better.)
- I wrote numerous blogs earlier in the year about how terrible Jacksonville is (please notice I wrote "IS"). Now? They are in first place in their division after losing again! Why are we only talking about the NFC West?
All of these definitely provided for a crazy week in sports both real and fake, but nothing was as crazy as the phone call I had after my soccer game last night. Jason called me twice earlier in the day, so when I called him back you can believe my surprise when he said "I have been checking all of these emails all week so that I can read your blog, and you haven't posted one." Jason overnight apparently went from the person to ignore more emails about my blog, to my number one fan. Wow. I have no idea what to expect going into week 13, but I do know you can expect rankings to come next.....
White Rice - Dan - All but locked up the #1 seed with his win over Will. No surprise but the big days came from Kyle Orton (25.88), Brandon Lloyd (19.6), and Arian Foster (21.8). You know, I never really gave it credit before but Arian may be foreal. I have no proof or evidence, but I think his name is awesome. Reminds me of Marshall Faulk or Walter Payton. Just sounds like a nice shifty back. There. I hope my curse is now complete. Speaking of curses, wow is Chris Johnson inconstant. The 0.7 came at just the right time for Dan, but is he now worthless thanks to worthless Rusty Smith? We can all only hope so.
Velour Fog - Titus - Thanks dick! Yes we can all blame the Ray Rice phantom touchdown for Titus losing this week, but I'm just going to hold a grudge against him personally. Adrian put up his second lowest point total for the season and allowed Peach to squeak by and possibly into the playoffs. Remember all the RunDMC talk earlier in the season? Well since his 43.6 outburst he has scored 13.5, 9.4, 3.0, and 6.5 this week. Gradkowski is out for the season so the qb controversy in Oakland is over. Maybe that's what its going to take to get RunDMC running again.
Do You Like Apples? - WOW did he get up here fast. I thought the big 3 were basically locked up, but now Hittner has a chance to actually be the #2 seed! If Titus loses to the resurgent TipDrillers and Hittner is able to beat Alec he would jump in standings! Hittner has an 82.76 point lead over Titus right now, and you would have to think that he will hold the tiebreaker after this week. In his 4 game winning streak Hittner has been the top scorer twice, and the second leading scorer once. Yes, this is the team you don't want to play.
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - His record was 8-1 for the first 9 weeks of the season. Since then, 0-3. Must be nice to clinic a playoff spot before you do a complete tailspin out of control. As mentioned above Alec will be facing Hittner this week and can probably expect another loss. If the Colts (Wayne, Brown) can't get themselves together, and Adrian Peterson's injury proves to be serious I can see 0-5 in Alec's future, which would make this kind of a wasted season, right?
The Heaphopapotomus - Death - Hooray Adrian Peterson injury. Is there some kind of irony to Alec having the 'Skins D which injured his best player Adrian Peterson? Maybe. Is it possible that Dan Carpenter is actually Jesus Christ (17 points this week)? I'm not going to write it off yet. Did the NFC west really have 2 teams make it to the playoffs with 8-8 records? YUP, and they both went to the Super Bowl. I'm ok with being the Rams this year.
TheBlairWhiteProject - Peach - So I'm watching PTI on Tuesday and Tony is talking about Peyton Manning and his lack of weapons. He mentions Jacob Tamme and then talks about Blair White, or as Tony likes to call him "TheBlairWhiteProject". Hmmm. Did Peach rip off Tony Kornhieser, or Kornhieser rip off Peach? I would really like to know! What I do know is Peach has been playing the role of clever matchup gm and found a diamond this week in Maurice Morris (19.5 points). He won a low scoring game against Titus (the #2 team) and now has a match up for his playoff future against Dan (#1 team). Ohhhh you can cut the pressure with a knife!
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Wow. 7th? He's in 7th? So Stilt who was one of the 4 most dominant teams may not make the playoffs? Crazy. Right now Stilt is tied for the longest current losing streak at 5 games and going. Last week he actually posted his highest score....since his last win. Shame he had to face that Hittner guy. It will be interesting to see what he is able to do against Lars who was just eliminated last week.
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Third highest overall scorer, 8th best record. Kirby's playoff hopes are dark, but at least they are still there. I mean he does still have Dwayne Bowe who scored 35 points this week. Oh if your wondering, yes that is over 42% of Kirby's scoring during week 12. Boy, Pitz really did do a number on this guy didn't he?
Gunners Treble - Lars - And then there was 4. Lars is out and looking forward to an early pick in what is probably going to be a pretty weak draft. His team of aging stars seems like they are about to start hitting the wall. LT is losing carries to Shone Green, TO may kill Carsen Palmer soon, and well actually Matt Hasselback had a pretty good week. At least he has Larry Fitzgerald for next season, although nobody knows who is going to throw him the ball.
Just The Tip Drill - Pitz - At one point was viewed as a lock for the #1 pick Pitz may now find himself at 5-8 as he rides out a stretch where he has won 3 of his last 4 games. The Micheal Vick experence has been good to Pitz (24.7), as was Deion Branch's Thanksgiving show (23.3), and not to mention the once a 4th stringer Mike Goodson (19.6). Yea....none of those guys were on his team to start the season.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - Back to back wins, well if they win one more you know what they call that, a winning streak. Has Jason figured out this crazy game? Start the best players and good things may happen? Who knows? I do know he cannot keep complaining about the Joe Flacco pick. He was the second leading scorer for Jason this week (18.36) behind Nate Kaeding (20.00). What is up with these kickers?
crash and burn - Will - We need to host the draft next year at a bigger house, now that we know Will will be the one fetching all of our beverages throughout the night. Will had a pretty decent week, with Knowshon, Mason and Miles Austin all scoring over 14 points, but the combo of Jerome Harrison, Rob My Bironas, and Indy D got him a total of 2.6 points. An average of 0.87 per player. That's good, right?
Well happy final week of the regular season everyone. Time sure does fly when your wasting time on the waiver wire. Until next week know your role, and shut your mouth!
- Steve Johnson dropped a pass that would have won the game for his team, blamed God and then was PRAISED by the media for being so stand up about the situation. Really? If this was 100 years ago and somebody blamed God for a mistake weren't they deemed a witch and burned at the stake? Also when did we start calling him Stevie Johnson? Was there an actual conversation when he went up to somebody and said, "Look, I'm 25 years old. This "Steve" business just isn't my style. Can you call me Stevie like when I was 7? Thanks"
- The same media that praised little Stevie, RIPPED Derek Anderson for laughing during a blow out and then storming off in a postgame interview. Did anyone hear how the whole thing played out? We counted, the person who asked Derek "Why were you laughing?" asked him 12 times before he lost his mind. 12! After the 7th time Derek should have been allowed to throw the podium at him, laugh more hysterically than the Joker and scream THIS IS WHY I'M LAUGHING!!! Why does the media get to be so high and mighty and judgmental? Such a joke.
- Andre Johnson and Cortland Finnegan got into an all out brawl where punches were thrown while the players helmets were off. Needless to say both were ejected. What was strange was that nobody was suspended and both players were fined $25,000. Now, a $25,000 fine would ruin my life no question, but this is way to small of a punishment. Don't get me wrong I loved watching Andre beat the crap out of Cortland (also of all the receivers in the NFL to start crap with you choose Andre Johnson, really Cortland?), but the $25,000 fine for those two was the same as James Harrison's fine for tackling the quarterback. NFL needs to figure this crap out.
- Going into week 13 there is a possibility that there will be 3 white starting running backs in the NFL (Peyton Hillis, Danny Woodhead, and Toby Gerhart) and nothing seems weird about it. They are all good, but when was the last time this happened, 1935? When were blacks allowed in the NFL? Peach get Stat Boy on the phone!!!!
- The Baltimore Ravens top pass rusher came out this week and said that quitting cocaine is the reason for his resurgent season. He also claimed it was a joke, and I do find it hilarious, but ummmm should somebody maybe drug test Fabian Washington?
- I am terrified of Will this weekend
- A holding call that nullified a Ray Rice touchdown affected 3 of us this week. Titus got the loss, Peach stayed in the playoff hunt, and I couldn't clinch my playoff spot. Seems like the only team it didn't seem to bother was the actual Baltimore Ravens.
- Qatar is smaller then Connecticut and yet will host the World Cup, because they can provide air conditioned stadiums. Russia will also get to host a World Cup four years prior to Qatar. Has there ever been two more dramatically different climates? Add South Africa to this mess and you have basically a shower where someone flushed a toilet. HOT, COLD, HOT!!! (Yes I know South Africa was actually cold at this WC, but come on that joke was gold!)
- One last World Cup point. England was credited with being the Birthplace of Football/Soccer and yet they haven't hosted a World Cup since 1966! I also enjoyed FIFA claiming that the possibility of making money (which the US had the greatest capacity to do of any potential host nation) was not a factor in their decision, and yet you could actually see the voters counting their Qatar money! You could tell it was from Cutter, I mean Qatar, because of the oil stains on each bit of currency. (I don't know if this is true, but it makes me feel better.)
- I wrote numerous blogs earlier in the year about how terrible Jacksonville is (please notice I wrote "IS"). Now? They are in first place in their division after losing again! Why are we only talking about the NFC West?
All of these definitely provided for a crazy week in sports both real and fake, but nothing was as crazy as the phone call I had after my soccer game last night. Jason called me twice earlier in the day, so when I called him back you can believe my surprise when he said "I have been checking all of these emails all week so that I can read your blog, and you haven't posted one." Jason overnight apparently went from the person to ignore more emails about my blog, to my number one fan. Wow. I have no idea what to expect going into week 13, but I do know you can expect rankings to come next.....
White Rice - Dan - All but locked up the #1 seed with his win over Will. No surprise but the big days came from Kyle Orton (25.88), Brandon Lloyd (19.6), and Arian Foster (21.8). You know, I never really gave it credit before but Arian may be foreal. I have no proof or evidence, but I think his name is awesome. Reminds me of Marshall Faulk or Walter Payton. Just sounds like a nice shifty back. There. I hope my curse is now complete. Speaking of curses, wow is Chris Johnson inconstant. The 0.7 came at just the right time for Dan, but is he now worthless thanks to worthless Rusty Smith? We can all only hope so.
Velour Fog - Titus - Thanks dick! Yes we can all blame the Ray Rice phantom touchdown for Titus losing this week, but I'm just going to hold a grudge against him personally. Adrian put up his second lowest point total for the season and allowed Peach to squeak by and possibly into the playoffs. Remember all the RunDMC talk earlier in the season? Well since his 43.6 outburst he has scored 13.5, 9.4, 3.0, and 6.5 this week. Gradkowski is out for the season so the qb controversy in Oakland is over. Maybe that's what its going to take to get RunDMC running again.
Do You Like Apples? - WOW did he get up here fast. I thought the big 3 were basically locked up, but now Hittner has a chance to actually be the #2 seed! If Titus loses to the resurgent TipDrillers and Hittner is able to beat Alec he would jump in standings! Hittner has an 82.76 point lead over Titus right now, and you would have to think that he will hold the tiebreaker after this week. In his 4 game winning streak Hittner has been the top scorer twice, and the second leading scorer once. Yes, this is the team you don't want to play.
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - His record was 8-1 for the first 9 weeks of the season. Since then, 0-3. Must be nice to clinic a playoff spot before you do a complete tailspin out of control. As mentioned above Alec will be facing Hittner this week and can probably expect another loss. If the Colts (Wayne, Brown) can't get themselves together, and Adrian Peterson's injury proves to be serious I can see 0-5 in Alec's future, which would make this kind of a wasted season, right?
The Heaphopapotomus - Death - Hooray Adrian Peterson injury. Is there some kind of irony to Alec having the 'Skins D which injured his best player Adrian Peterson? Maybe. Is it possible that Dan Carpenter is actually Jesus Christ (17 points this week)? I'm not going to write it off yet. Did the NFC west really have 2 teams make it to the playoffs with 8-8 records? YUP, and they both went to the Super Bowl. I'm ok with being the Rams this year.
TheBlairWhiteProject - Peach - So I'm watching PTI on Tuesday and Tony is talking about Peyton Manning and his lack of weapons. He mentions Jacob Tamme and then talks about Blair White, or as Tony likes to call him "TheBlairWhiteProject". Hmmm. Did Peach rip off Tony Kornhieser, or Kornhieser rip off Peach? I would really like to know! What I do know is Peach has been playing the role of clever matchup gm and found a diamond this week in Maurice Morris (19.5 points). He won a low scoring game against Titus (the #2 team) and now has a match up for his playoff future against Dan (#1 team). Ohhhh you can cut the pressure with a knife!
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Wow. 7th? He's in 7th? So Stilt who was one of the 4 most dominant teams may not make the playoffs? Crazy. Right now Stilt is tied for the longest current losing streak at 5 games and going. Last week he actually posted his highest score....since his last win. Shame he had to face that Hittner guy. It will be interesting to see what he is able to do against Lars who was just eliminated last week.
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Third highest overall scorer, 8th best record. Kirby's playoff hopes are dark, but at least they are still there. I mean he does still have Dwayne Bowe who scored 35 points this week. Oh if your wondering, yes that is over 42% of Kirby's scoring during week 12. Boy, Pitz really did do a number on this guy didn't he?
Gunners Treble - Lars - And then there was 4. Lars is out and looking forward to an early pick in what is probably going to be a pretty weak draft. His team of aging stars seems like they are about to start hitting the wall. LT is losing carries to Shone Green, TO may kill Carsen Palmer soon, and well actually Matt Hasselback had a pretty good week. At least he has Larry Fitzgerald for next season, although nobody knows who is going to throw him the ball.
Just The Tip Drill - Pitz - At one point was viewed as a lock for the #1 pick Pitz may now find himself at 5-8 as he rides out a stretch where he has won 3 of his last 4 games. The Micheal Vick experence has been good to Pitz (24.7), as was Deion Branch's Thanksgiving show (23.3), and not to mention the once a 4th stringer Mike Goodson (19.6). Yea....none of those guys were on his team to start the season.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - Back to back wins, well if they win one more you know what they call that, a winning streak. Has Jason figured out this crazy game? Start the best players and good things may happen? Who knows? I do know he cannot keep complaining about the Joe Flacco pick. He was the second leading scorer for Jason this week (18.36) behind Nate Kaeding (20.00). What is up with these kickers?
crash and burn - Will - We need to host the draft next year at a bigger house, now that we know Will will be the one fetching all of our beverages throughout the night. Will had a pretty decent week, with Knowshon, Mason and Miles Austin all scoring over 14 points, but the combo of Jerome Harrison, Rob My Bironas, and Indy D got him a total of 2.6 points. An average of 0.87 per player. That's good, right?
Well happy final week of the regular season everyone. Time sure does fly when your wasting time on the waiver wire. Until next week know your role, and shut your mouth!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Week 11 Recap
If you guys ever listen to my rants then you will know that I HATE how wrapped up the world gets in Christmas, but yet everyone is so willing to let Thanksgiving just slip away. Thanksgiving is the best holiday ever! Ever! Lets look at it for a second. We sit around, watch football and eat, well, everything! Nobody is forced to spend hundreds (if not more) on presents, and don't get me started on the whole wrapping thing. I don't even think I have anymore points I need to make. Well with that being said, and after reading a few articles that were based on Thanksgiving, I'm going to give it a shot this week to give my dedication to two of my favorite things; Thanksgiving and Infinite Dena Power! As I go down the standings and recap each team, I'm also going to try and match up the team to what part of Thanksgiving they would be. I have no idea how this is going to go.
White Rice - Dan - The Dallas Cowboys - Lets be honest, unless you're a Dallas Cowboys fan you always root against this team and that's exactly how everyone in this league feels about Dan. Nobody should be surprised, I dedicated a whole blog to Dan being the villian! Just as annoying as it is to hear Jerry Jones talk about how great his stadium is or hear about "Americas Team" its just as annoying to hear Dan talk about drafting Arian Foster or that he has Brandon Lloyd and Kyle Orton. Sadly unlike the current Cowboys Dan is actually backing up his talk. The three players I just listed combined for roughly 50 points in the demolishing of Alec. Hmmm maybe Dan is the 90's Dallas Cowboys when they were winning all the championships....you know what lets just wait and see. He could actually be the Tony Romo lead Cowboys who struggle to win playoff games. I know that's what we are all hoping for.
Velour Fog - Titus - Stuffing - In my personal opinion stuffing is the best part about Thanksgiving Dinner. I know for a fact I'm going to have at least 5 helpings of it tomorrow, and that's not even counting all the sandwiches I'm going to be making that includes this delicious carb. With that being said Titus has to be listed as one of the favorites going into the playoffs. He has already clinched with two weeks still to go, and is in prime position to get a first round bye. His pick up's of Mike Thomas and Chicago D has just made this well drafted team into a dominate force. Keep in mind Titus doesn't even worry about starting Matt Forte, a player who probably is an every week starter on a lot of our teams. I'm pretty sure Peach is more excited about the stuffing he is having right now at the PTI set, then the match up he has this week.
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - Mashed Potatoes - Not as good as the stuffing, but you know your slopping a huge pile of this on your plate tomorrow. Alec has already clenched a playoff birth, even if it did come with a loss to Dan. Not a bad time for the Grabbers to lock up the playoffs with match ups against Death and Hittner, two surging potential playoff teams, to end the season. Just like mashed potatoes you know they are going to be there at dinner tomorrow night, you know you're going to have some, you just have to hope its going to be the delicious thick kind that could be the best part of dinner and not the sloppy watered down stuff that you push off to the side of your plate.
Do You Like Apples - Hittner - Pumpkin Pie - Starting to get that feeling that this team is going to be around at the end of the night arnt ya? Hittner has been on a sweet run to finish out the season winning 7 of his last 9 games riding players like Roddy White, Peyton Hillis and Maurice Jones-Drew. In this past weeks high score of 137.64 those three players combined for over 65 points! Roddy White's 10.3 was the second lowest score! Top off this pie with a little bit of whip cream, or Aaron Rodgers if you will, and you got one delicious treat.
The Heaphopapotomus - Death - Red Wine - Or white if that's your thing. Sadly I'm not going to enjoy writing this, but here's the thing about wine on Thanksgiving, everyone has a glass or two at dinner but then everyone moves on to beer or some cocktail for the rest of the night. That's kinda how this team is looking right now. Big win over Stilt which has improved their chances to make the playoffs but nobody is really going to expect them to hang around. Not sure how long you can lean on Danny Woodhead and a kicker and expect to come home with a championship. Hope I'm wrong, I hope this year everyone gets floored with Merlot, but I'm betting I'm drinking Coors Light tomorrow.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Thanksgiving Day Macy's Parade - Every year the Parade goes off while people are finishing the last minute baking or waiting for the rest of the guests to arrive. People love the parade in the morning, but by the time dinner comes around nobody is talking about it any more. Remember when Stilt was one of the best teams in this league? Feels like forever ago. Stilt has given two wins away to Kirby and Death by not setting his line up, and now his playoff hopes are on the line with match ups against Hittner and Larsen (no easy matches). You ask me, well see some more performances out of Matt Ryan and Andre Johnson, but just like after we see Spiderman and Underdog past by we wont hear from the this team again till next years draft.
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Beer - How fitting is it that our own little brewer's team is just like beer? As I mentioned earlier with alcohol wine is perfect for the meal, but not the whole day. Once the decision is made that people are going to drink, they are going to be drinking beer all night long! Kirby has the most points for his team of everyone in the 6-5 and 5-6 cluster meaning the tiebreaker is all his. His next two match ups are favorable as he goes against Pitz and Jason...though didn't he lose to both of them earlier in the year? Ethier way Kirby, Dwayne Bowe and Frank Gore all control their own destiny. All they need to do is convince the dinner feast to crack the first beer and enjoy a Kirby homebrew out of the Dena mug!
face. - Peach - Turkey - This one is too easy. He drafted Peyton Manning first, overall, in a keeper league. Take a look at his team right now. Injuries have just started to decimate Peach. His running backs are a Redskins' rookie (Keiland Williams), a third stringer on the Lions (Maurice Morris) and LT's spell back (Shonn Green). This team was leaning on two young receivers, DeSean Jackson and Hakeem Nicks, but now Nicks is out for the next 3 weeks. Not looking good for Peach for the playoffs. Quick sidebar, how great is it that Peach had to find a list of this years "turkeys" for PTI and I flip it a few hours later and call him one! Ahhh I'm so clever...
Gunners Treble - Lars - Apple Pie - Well it could be any other dessert that people bring that you still eat any other day of the year. What usually happens is there is so much food all over the place and your stuffing your face with all the classic Thanksgiving food like Turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie, veggies, mashed potatoes and left over sandwiches that you completely forget about the extra desserts. That has kind of been the season for Lars, very forgettable. . Quick right now name 3 players on Lar's team. I got one right before I went back and checked. Wait, what was I talking about, I forgot again.....
Just the Tip Drill - Pitz - Cranberry Sauce - This was the hardest one for me to come up with, but I think I got it. This team was awful all year, but there was a lot of good moves which lead to a vast improvement and may even lead to a big turnaround next season. So here's how I see it, you ethier love or hate cranberry sauce. No inbetween. If you see this as a turn around season and a glass half full view for next year, you love it, if you see it as a waste of a year and team already eliminated from playoff contention well then you think cranberry sauce is just crap out of a can.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - Detroit Lions - Everyone roots for the Lions on Thanksgiving! How can you root for them to lose, come on! Just like they had Barry Sanders, Jason has Flacco (a player most of us want to see do well). Jason is the antiDan. Nobody gets mad at him because he's so non-threatening. Also like the Detroit Lions, Jason's biggest question about his season is does he end up with the number 1 pick. Hmm these are getting shorter, must be ready to wrap it up.
crash and burn - Will - Naps -Kind of like what you do whenever you see Will on your schedule, you relax, curl up, close your eyes and know everything is going to be ok. Everyone loves the Thanksgiving nap, just like everyone loves crash and burn on their schedule. It could be the most important part of Thanksgiving. You get the nap, refresh and go right back to work with the good food. Same with the Buffalo Wills!
Ok everyone now that we are all starving and ready for the best dinner of the year I leave you with these seven words:
"Nobody tell Stilt football is on tomorrow"
White Rice - Dan - The Dallas Cowboys - Lets be honest, unless you're a Dallas Cowboys fan you always root against this team and that's exactly how everyone in this league feels about Dan. Nobody should be surprised, I dedicated a whole blog to Dan being the villian! Just as annoying as it is to hear Jerry Jones talk about how great his stadium is or hear about "Americas Team" its just as annoying to hear Dan talk about drafting Arian Foster or that he has Brandon Lloyd and Kyle Orton. Sadly unlike the current Cowboys Dan is actually backing up his talk. The three players I just listed combined for roughly 50 points in the demolishing of Alec. Hmmm maybe Dan is the 90's Dallas Cowboys when they were winning all the championships....you know what lets just wait and see. He could actually be the Tony Romo lead Cowboys who struggle to win playoff games. I know that's what we are all hoping for.
Velour Fog - Titus - Stuffing - In my personal opinion stuffing is the best part about Thanksgiving Dinner. I know for a fact I'm going to have at least 5 helpings of it tomorrow, and that's not even counting all the sandwiches I'm going to be making that includes this delicious carb. With that being said Titus has to be listed as one of the favorites going into the playoffs. He has already clinched with two weeks still to go, and is in prime position to get a first round bye. His pick up's of Mike Thomas and Chicago D has just made this well drafted team into a dominate force. Keep in mind Titus doesn't even worry about starting Matt Forte, a player who probably is an every week starter on a lot of our teams. I'm pretty sure Peach is more excited about the stuffing he is having right now at the PTI set, then the match up he has this week.
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - Mashed Potatoes - Not as good as the stuffing, but you know your slopping a huge pile of this on your plate tomorrow. Alec has already clenched a playoff birth, even if it did come with a loss to Dan. Not a bad time for the Grabbers to lock up the playoffs with match ups against Death and Hittner, two surging potential playoff teams, to end the season. Just like mashed potatoes you know they are going to be there at dinner tomorrow night, you know you're going to have some, you just have to hope its going to be the delicious thick kind that could be the best part of dinner and not the sloppy watered down stuff that you push off to the side of your plate.
Do You Like Apples - Hittner - Pumpkin Pie - Starting to get that feeling that this team is going to be around at the end of the night arnt ya? Hittner has been on a sweet run to finish out the season winning 7 of his last 9 games riding players like Roddy White, Peyton Hillis and Maurice Jones-Drew. In this past weeks high score of 137.64 those three players combined for over 65 points! Roddy White's 10.3 was the second lowest score! Top off this pie with a little bit of whip cream, or Aaron Rodgers if you will, and you got one delicious treat.
The Heaphopapotomus - Death - Red Wine - Or white if that's your thing. Sadly I'm not going to enjoy writing this, but here's the thing about wine on Thanksgiving, everyone has a glass or two at dinner but then everyone moves on to beer or some cocktail for the rest of the night. That's kinda how this team is looking right now. Big win over Stilt which has improved their chances to make the playoffs but nobody is really going to expect them to hang around. Not sure how long you can lean on Danny Woodhead and a kicker and expect to come home with a championship. Hope I'm wrong, I hope this year everyone gets floored with Merlot, but I'm betting I'm drinking Coors Light tomorrow.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Thanksgiving Day Macy's Parade - Every year the Parade goes off while people are finishing the last minute baking or waiting for the rest of the guests to arrive. People love the parade in the morning, but by the time dinner comes around nobody is talking about it any more. Remember when Stilt was one of the best teams in this league? Feels like forever ago. Stilt has given two wins away to Kirby and Death by not setting his line up, and now his playoff hopes are on the line with match ups against Hittner and Larsen (no easy matches). You ask me, well see some more performances out of Matt Ryan and Andre Johnson, but just like after we see Spiderman and Underdog past by we wont hear from the this team again till next years draft.
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Beer - How fitting is it that our own little brewer's team is just like beer? As I mentioned earlier with alcohol wine is perfect for the meal, but not the whole day. Once the decision is made that people are going to drink, they are going to be drinking beer all night long! Kirby has the most points for his team of everyone in the 6-5 and 5-6 cluster meaning the tiebreaker is all his. His next two match ups are favorable as he goes against Pitz and Jason...though didn't he lose to both of them earlier in the year? Ethier way Kirby, Dwayne Bowe and Frank Gore all control their own destiny. All they need to do is convince the dinner feast to crack the first beer and enjoy a Kirby homebrew out of the Dena mug!
face. - Peach - Turkey - This one is too easy. He drafted Peyton Manning first, overall, in a keeper league. Take a look at his team right now. Injuries have just started to decimate Peach. His running backs are a Redskins' rookie (Keiland Williams), a third stringer on the Lions (Maurice Morris) and LT's spell back (Shonn Green). This team was leaning on two young receivers, DeSean Jackson and Hakeem Nicks, but now Nicks is out for the next 3 weeks. Not looking good for Peach for the playoffs. Quick sidebar, how great is it that Peach had to find a list of this years "turkeys" for PTI and I flip it a few hours later and call him one! Ahhh I'm so clever...
Gunners Treble - Lars - Apple Pie - Well it could be any other dessert that people bring that you still eat any other day of the year. What usually happens is there is so much food all over the place and your stuffing your face with all the classic Thanksgiving food like Turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie, veggies, mashed potatoes and left over sandwiches that you completely forget about the extra desserts. That has kind of been the season for Lars, very forgettable. . Quick right now name 3 players on Lar's team. I got one right before I went back and checked. Wait, what was I talking about, I forgot again.....
Just the Tip Drill - Pitz - Cranberry Sauce - This was the hardest one for me to come up with, but I think I got it. This team was awful all year, but there was a lot of good moves which lead to a vast improvement and may even lead to a big turnaround next season. So here's how I see it, you ethier love or hate cranberry sauce. No inbetween. If you see this as a turn around season and a glass half full view for next year, you love it, if you see it as a waste of a year and team already eliminated from playoff contention well then you think cranberry sauce is just crap out of a can.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - Detroit Lions - Everyone roots for the Lions on Thanksgiving! How can you root for them to lose, come on! Just like they had Barry Sanders, Jason has Flacco (a player most of us want to see do well). Jason is the antiDan. Nobody gets mad at him because he's so non-threatening. Also like the Detroit Lions, Jason's biggest question about his season is does he end up with the number 1 pick. Hmm these are getting shorter, must be ready to wrap it up.
crash and burn - Will - Naps -Kind of like what you do whenever you see Will on your schedule, you relax, curl up, close your eyes and know everything is going to be ok. Everyone loves the Thanksgiving nap, just like everyone loves crash and burn on their schedule. It could be the most important part of Thanksgiving. You get the nap, refresh and go right back to work with the good food. Same with the Buffalo Wills!
Ok everyone now that we are all starving and ready for the best dinner of the year I leave you with these seven words:
"Nobody tell Stilt football is on tomorrow"
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Week 10 Recap
So yea I guess we should have a week 9 recap around here somewhere, well I don't, sorry. I decided instead to go to Atlanta to watch the Ravens defense lose the lead with a minute left in the game. It's not easy for me to process not having a dominant defense...in reality, I think we all know I sure don't have a dominant defense in fantasy. Well while some of us were in Atlanta something important happened, the trade deadline ended. That's right, whatever terrible team you have, well you're stuck with it. Some of us took note to this realization after the draft and actually did do something to make their "franchise" better. LETS TAKE A LOOK!!!!!!!!!!!
9/12/10 - Death gets Wes Welker/Kirby gets Dwayne Bowe
The first trade of the season happened before the season even started. Kirby saw a problem with having two receivers on the same team (Moss was the other, oh what little did he know) meaning they were both going to have the same bye week. Death saw both receivers as gambles. Welker having the knee surgery the year before, and Matt Cassel having no idea Dwayne Bowe actually played on the same team as him. Well within two weeks Wes Welker had 3 touchdowns and showed no signs of the knee being a problem at all, while Matt Cassel had still YET to be introduced to D-Bowe. After week 3 that changed, and changed quickly. The story basically goes Randy Moss left so defenses started paying more attention to Welker, and Dwayne Bowe has gone OFF! Right now the head to head scoring isn't even close Dwayne Bowe 115 to Wes Welker 63.4.
Winner - Kirby EASSSSSSSILY.
9/27/10 - Pitz gets Steve Smith (Carolina)/Dan gets Chad Ochocinco
Another swap of wide receivers, although for the life of me I cant remember why this deal happened. At first I thought it was because both receivers struggled out of the gate, but here are both receivers numbers for week one and two; Steve Smith 13.5, 12.6 Chad Ochocinco 21.9, 4.4. I'm not going to speak for either player but I will point out that Steve Smith has been dropped and Dan has been trying to trade Ochocinco for 85 cents on the dollar. What I do know though is that Steve Smith didn't cost me a loss, but Ochocinco did have one of his best weeks against me in a week that I lost to Dan by 1 point and he got the start only because a worker at Verizonwireless thought Ocho was cute and that Dan should start him. Feel free to scroll down and read my blog about how everyone in the league hates Dan.
Winner- Push, but somehow I'm the loser again.
9/27/2010 - Pitz gets Mike Wallace/Kirby gets Marion Barber III
Typical I need a receiver you need a running back move. At the time the Cowboys were struggling and Ben Rapelisberger was still suspended. Seems like there wouldn't be much to talk about.....BUT WAIT! Ladies and gentleman, I bring you the Fifagate trade! This trade, and the trade above somehow didn't go through for what seemed to be 8 days later and Pitz was unable to start Mike Wallace who scored 21.9 points that week. Instead of Pitz getting his second win of the season, he had to wait 6 weeks later! Oh and did you know Pitz was playing Dan that week? Seriously go back and read about how everyone hates Dan.
Winner - Kirby by default
10/2/10 - Death gets Hines Ward and Hittner's 11th round pick/Hittner gets Micheal Crabtree and Death's 6th round pick
FIRST TRADE INVOLVING DRAFT PICKS! Can we all look back at this trade in 10 years and reflect on how historic it really was? Not everyone was fully aware of how moving picks would work or for that point what value does each round have. All in all when determining the value of this trade there really isn't much. Hittner couldn't stand having Hines Ward on his team any longer, and Death was looking for a receiver since both of his starters had their bye on week 4. It just made sense to unload both. Since then Ward has been traded and Crabtree hasn't had a start yet.
Winner - Push. Death got the upgrade at the position and Hittner jumped 5 rounds in the draft.
10/9/10 - Peach gets Ryan Torain/Hittner gets Jeremy Maclin
Hittner killed the waiver wire at the running back position by getting guys like Peyton Hillis and Ryan Torain, both of which have proven to be very productive starters for their real life teams when they had plenty of questions about them prior to their first game. There wasn't as many questions about Jeremy Maclin who was emerging as a bright young wide receiver on a team notorious for throwing the ball. That throwing team is also the same team that Peach has an unhealthy obsession with, which kind of shows how desperate Peach was for a starting running back. Since joining Face. Torain has scored 6.9, 22.9, 10.5, 8.9, and Monday night's goose egg. Maclin in that same time scored 9.5, 27.9, 5.6, 4.8 and 15.0. Even thought Peach got the much needed upgrade at the running back position, Hittner took a bench player and got himself a starting wide receiver.
Winner - Hittner
10/10/10 - Death gets TJ Houshmandzadeh and Will's 4th round pick/Will gets Hines Ward
Crazy date! Crazy reaction to the trade! At first there was alot of talk about vetoing this trade due to unfairness. This trade should remind everyone that we have a TWELVE ROUND DRAFT not 15. Either way the break down goes like this Will got a producing wide receiver who starts for him and Death got a solid pick for a player who was on his bench. This still appears to be a fair deal, but I'll tip the scales to Death when you notice Housh immediately got dropped and Danny Woodhead was picked up in his place.
Winner - Death (1 out of 3 aint bad!)
11/4/2010 - Hittner gets Aaron Rodgers and Will's 9th round pick/Will gets Matt Schaub and Hittner's 5th round pick
And I thought the last trade sparked controversy! For those who don't remember this is basically the "Loan Trade". The stipulation behind this deal is that Schaub and Rodgers return to their original owners at the end of the season. This trade was not allowed to be vetoed this year, but it will be questioned at the GM summit next season. Is loaning fair? Should it continue? Do I still think Will should have tried to get a 4th round pick at least? Not answering any of the questions here.
Winner - Push. Hittner made the run for the championship, Will came up with a clever way to rebuild next year (Side Bar: If Hittner does win because of this pick he should be named the winner)
11/5/2010 - Pitz gets Micheal Vick, Randy Moss, Kirby's second round pick/Kirby gets Anquan Boldin and Carson Palmer
This was the trade for the hottest commodity on the trade block, Anquan Boldin. Numerous owners offered different packages to Pitz (no homo) for Q, but you cant really question him for taking this one. He now has more picks in the first and second round then anyone else, and potentially picked up two keepers depending how Vick and Moss play out the rest of the season (and any offseason moves). Kirby did get a play making wr he needed, but after the way Vick has been playing since his injury PLUS the early pick Kirby gave up, you have to wonder if he gave a way a bit too much. I should also mention that any team that has Carson Palmer is worse just by association. Just saying.
Winner - Pitz
11/5/2010 - Pitz gets Jabar Gaffney and Dan's 5th round pick/Dan gets Mike Wallace and Pitz's 8th round pick
Just me or is Pitz on this list ALOT?!? So Pitz gets a 3 round jump, but Dan gets a difference making WR for his playoff push. Since the trade Gaffney had his bye week and then was able to join in on the beat up on the Chiefs for 11.7 points. Mike Wallace on the other hand has gone OFF! 17 and 25.6 points. Everyone knew Wallace would be better as the season went on and yet he was traded twice this season! Seems like a no brainer that Dan is the winner here, BUT HES NOT! Mike Wallace has been a cancer to Pitz's team all year. Since the trade Pitz is 2-0, coincidence?
Winner - Push
11/12/2010 - Pitz gets Thomas Jones and Dan's 10th round pick/Dan gets Cedric Benson and Pitz's 12 round pick
Dan and Pitz trade together a lot! Pitz will be finished drafting before the 12 round thanks to this deal, and Dan got what he views as an upgrade at the running back position. Did he though? As of right now Benson has 92.7 points to Jones' 79.3. Benson's schedule has BUF, NYJ, NO, PITT, CLE, SD, BAL to end the season, Jones on the other hand has ARI, SEA, DEN, SD, STL, TEN, OAK. Much easier stretch going into the playoffs. Seeing as how Pitz upgraded his draft status for a pretty even rb swap he gets this win in my book.
Winner - Pitz
Just as the tradedeadline has past so has this portion of the blog....RANKINGS BITCHES!
White Rice - Dan - Well Alec's run up top didn't last long. Dan took out all of his frustration from the Larsen loss on long time friend Stilt. Dan can thank Kyle Orton 27.74, Mike Wallace 25.6, Brandon Lloyd 21.00 and CJ2K 18.4 for a 125 point dick slap that will leave paint marks all over Stilts face for the draft next year. Did anyone else notice Tim Tebow playing at the end of the Broncos Chiefs game? Thanks McDaniels, you pull starters when your winning the blowout, but not losing. Yes I'm still not over my loss to Dan.
Velour Fog - Titus - "AND I WILL STRKE DOWN UPON THEE WITH GREAT VENGANCE AND FURRRRIOUS ANGER THOSE WHO WOULD ATTEMPT TO POISON AND DESTROY MY BROTHERS. AND YOU WILL KNOW I AM THE LORD WHEN I LAY MY VENGEANCE UPON THEE". Yes there were higher scores and larger differences in points but when two of the top three teams meet up and its just a massive beat down like saw, well yea I gotta throw the Pulp Fiction quote in here. Also if anyone missed it please look up the highlight that gave Jacksonville the win over the Texans. David Garrard throws up a hail mary that gets spiked right into the hands of Jacksonville receiver Mike Thomas. Who is Mike Thomas? Just some guy Titus picked up for this week and got him 22.7 points. You still think the Lord didn't have anything to do with this one?
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - Of course if Titus is Jules then Alec is Bret, the guy who gets shot up by Jules for "fucking Marsellus Wallace like a bitch". Rough rough week for Alec. Titus owned him in fantasy, and the Skins forgot to show up for the first half of Monday Night Football. Atleast the Skins locked up McNabb for 40 million (I know there are all kind of clauses now, but really what other franchise would have done what they did?). Maybe he gets his redemption in the playoffs?
Do You Like Apples? - Hittner - Soooooo close to doubling the total of his opponent! 126 points made Hittner the second highest scorer this week. Jamaal Charles, Peyton Hillis and MJD almost beat Jason single handed as they combined for 57.3 points. Roddy White joined in with 25.8 points, but I'm sure Hittner would love to give back at least 10 of those. I would love to talk about the difference that Aaron Rodgers made in this game, but he actually was on a bye! I wouldn't want to see this team any time soon.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Uh oh! The boat is sinking!!! 3 loses in a row and another playoff implication match this week verse Death. Wait ummm no jinx. Stilt is fine. Sooooo good. Not touching this any more, moving on! Good karma, good karma, good karma!!!
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Look at who is getting lucky now! Kirby went into the late game with a 4 point lead over Will who still had Hines Ward going. Ward gets a concussion and is not allowed to return after scoring....0 points. That lost could have been disastrous as Kirby has already lost to Jason and Pitz (who still had Mike Wallace on his team). The 4 o'clock games were quite nice to Kirby as he had Eli (22.62), D-Bowe (30.6), and Gore (21.4). 2 of those 3 players teams lost. Go garbage time points or in Frank Gore's case, overtime!
The Heaphopapotomus - Death - Bye week for Drew Brees. No backup quarterback. Vince Young injured. My choices Troy Smith, or Brett Favre. OF COURSE I TOOK TROY SMITH! A near 20 points later and I look like a genius. Steven Jackson finally scored a rushing touchdown and got me another 20 points, but week after week I think Dan Carpenter is becoming my mvp. Another double digit week from my kicker.
Face. - Peach - This matchup was really close going into Monday Night Football. Actually Peach was winning, AND had Desean Jackson on the 80 yard td to start the game! He did put it best when he pointed out he would never be happier to see a qb put up 50 points on him in fantasy. I believe him. I also believe he will be happy watching the Eagles in the playoffs since he probably won't be there for fantasy.
Gunners Treble - Big win verse Dan two weeks ago, but a let down performance this week against Death. Fitz is starting to heat up, and LT was able to pick up some extra points in the long overtime against the Browns. Matt Hasselbeck even looked promising until he injured his hand and let Charlie Whitehurst come in to play. This loss may have shut the door on Lar's season...so I want to talk about Charlie Whitehurst for a second. Has any 2nd string qb ever looked worse after having so much hype? Wait, yes, Jim Sorgi. Ah well Charlie Whitehurst sucks.
Just the Tip Drill - Pitz - Remember when he blew his team up looking towards next season and the draft? 2-0 since then and the happy owner of the Mike Vick experience that scored an amazing 49.32 points! This new squad ruined the excitement about Pitz/Jason this week. Sadly now it should just be a blowout and Pitz will get his 4th victory this season. It would be a great story if Pitz would make the playoffs, but it's probably fair to say that nobody wants to hear about this all off-season, especially since Pitz started making proclamations about being GM of the year. To me its kind of like congratulating somebody for beating their addiction with drugs. I mean yea its a good accomplishment and you should be proud, but why were you on crack to start with?
Crash and Burn - Will - That had to hurt. Despite his record Will has still been trying to win and after having a lot of his players blow up this week he had to think a win was coming his way. Knowshawn and Indy's D both had over 20 points which is a great start, but maybe next week Will will (tee hee) check and see if Mike Hart is going to play. Back to back weeks of starting an injured player is very Jasonish.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - Speak of the devil! I know for a fact Jason doesn't read this blog as I brought up to him the other day that I dedicated and entire introduction to him and he was clueless to what I was talking about. So who cares, this team is awful #1 overall pick is coming his way and I'm going to ramble for a second. Wolverine, dirty dipers, June 14, Pinky and the Brain, Community, Foghorn Leg Horn, Skippy peanut butter, R-Kelly's doo doo butter,Annie's boobs, pop tarts, lifevest, Hulk Hogan, Peter Parker, upside down pineapple cake, left hand turns, yellow, Timothy Dalton, Leon Hall, Big Bad Voodoo Daddies,1.21 jigawatts!!!!
Next week should be INTENSE as we inch closer and closer to seeing who is in the playoffs! We know Jason and Will have been eliminated, but nobody has technically clenched. Excited to see if anything else changes next week. Now you stay classy....PLANET EARTH!
9/12/10 - Death gets Wes Welker/Kirby gets Dwayne Bowe
The first trade of the season happened before the season even started. Kirby saw a problem with having two receivers on the same team (Moss was the other, oh what little did he know) meaning they were both going to have the same bye week. Death saw both receivers as gambles. Welker having the knee surgery the year before, and Matt Cassel having no idea Dwayne Bowe actually played on the same team as him. Well within two weeks Wes Welker had 3 touchdowns and showed no signs of the knee being a problem at all, while Matt Cassel had still YET to be introduced to D-Bowe. After week 3 that changed, and changed quickly. The story basically goes Randy Moss left so defenses started paying more attention to Welker, and Dwayne Bowe has gone OFF! Right now the head to head scoring isn't even close Dwayne Bowe 115 to Wes Welker 63.4.
Winner - Kirby EASSSSSSSILY.
9/27/10 - Pitz gets Steve Smith (Carolina)/Dan gets Chad Ochocinco
Another swap of wide receivers, although for the life of me I cant remember why this deal happened. At first I thought it was because both receivers struggled out of the gate, but here are both receivers numbers for week one and two; Steve Smith 13.5, 12.6 Chad Ochocinco 21.9, 4.4. I'm not going to speak for either player but I will point out that Steve Smith has been dropped and Dan has been trying to trade Ochocinco for 85 cents on the dollar. What I do know though is that Steve Smith didn't cost me a loss, but Ochocinco did have one of his best weeks against me in a week that I lost to Dan by 1 point and he got the start only because a worker at Verizonwireless thought Ocho was cute and that Dan should start him. Feel free to scroll down and read my blog about how everyone in the league hates Dan.
Winner- Push, but somehow I'm the loser again.
9/27/2010 - Pitz gets Mike Wallace/Kirby gets Marion Barber III
Typical I need a receiver you need a running back move. At the time the Cowboys were struggling and Ben Rapelisberger was still suspended. Seems like there wouldn't be much to talk about.....BUT WAIT! Ladies and gentleman, I bring you the Fifagate trade! This trade, and the trade above somehow didn't go through for what seemed to be 8 days later and Pitz was unable to start Mike Wallace who scored 21.9 points that week. Instead of Pitz getting his second win of the season, he had to wait 6 weeks later! Oh and did you know Pitz was playing Dan that week? Seriously go back and read about how everyone hates Dan.
Winner - Kirby by default
10/2/10 - Death gets Hines Ward and Hittner's 11th round pick/Hittner gets Micheal Crabtree and Death's 6th round pick
FIRST TRADE INVOLVING DRAFT PICKS! Can we all look back at this trade in 10 years and reflect on how historic it really was? Not everyone was fully aware of how moving picks would work or for that point what value does each round have. All in all when determining the value of this trade there really isn't much. Hittner couldn't stand having Hines Ward on his team any longer, and Death was looking for a receiver since both of his starters had their bye on week 4. It just made sense to unload both. Since then Ward has been traded and Crabtree hasn't had a start yet.
Winner - Push. Death got the upgrade at the position and Hittner jumped 5 rounds in the draft.
10/9/10 - Peach gets Ryan Torain/Hittner gets Jeremy Maclin
Hittner killed the waiver wire at the running back position by getting guys like Peyton Hillis and Ryan Torain, both of which have proven to be very productive starters for their real life teams when they had plenty of questions about them prior to their first game. There wasn't as many questions about Jeremy Maclin who was emerging as a bright young wide receiver on a team notorious for throwing the ball. That throwing team is also the same team that Peach has an unhealthy obsession with, which kind of shows how desperate Peach was for a starting running back. Since joining Face. Torain has scored 6.9, 22.9, 10.5, 8.9, and Monday night's goose egg. Maclin in that same time scored 9.5, 27.9, 5.6, 4.8 and 15.0. Even thought Peach got the much needed upgrade at the running back position, Hittner took a bench player and got himself a starting wide receiver.
Winner - Hittner
10/10/10 - Death gets TJ Houshmandzadeh and Will's 4th round pick/Will gets Hines Ward
Crazy date! Crazy reaction to the trade! At first there was alot of talk about vetoing this trade due to unfairness. This trade should remind everyone that we have a TWELVE ROUND DRAFT not 15. Either way the break down goes like this Will got a producing wide receiver who starts for him and Death got a solid pick for a player who was on his bench. This still appears to be a fair deal, but I'll tip the scales to Death when you notice Housh immediately got dropped and Danny Woodhead was picked up in his place.
Winner - Death (1 out of 3 aint bad!)
11/4/2010 - Hittner gets Aaron Rodgers and Will's 9th round pick/Will gets Matt Schaub and Hittner's 5th round pick
And I thought the last trade sparked controversy! For those who don't remember this is basically the "Loan Trade". The stipulation behind this deal is that Schaub and Rodgers return to their original owners at the end of the season. This trade was not allowed to be vetoed this year, but it will be questioned at the GM summit next season. Is loaning fair? Should it continue? Do I still think Will should have tried to get a 4th round pick at least? Not answering any of the questions here.
Winner - Push. Hittner made the run for the championship, Will came up with a clever way to rebuild next year (Side Bar: If Hittner does win because of this pick he should be named the winner)
11/5/2010 - Pitz gets Micheal Vick, Randy Moss, Kirby's second round pick/Kirby gets Anquan Boldin and Carson Palmer
This was the trade for the hottest commodity on the trade block, Anquan Boldin. Numerous owners offered different packages to Pitz (no homo) for Q, but you cant really question him for taking this one. He now has more picks in the first and second round then anyone else, and potentially picked up two keepers depending how Vick and Moss play out the rest of the season (and any offseason moves). Kirby did get a play making wr he needed, but after the way Vick has been playing since his injury PLUS the early pick Kirby gave up, you have to wonder if he gave a way a bit too much. I should also mention that any team that has Carson Palmer is worse just by association. Just saying.
Winner - Pitz
11/5/2010 - Pitz gets Jabar Gaffney and Dan's 5th round pick/Dan gets Mike Wallace and Pitz's 8th round pick
Just me or is Pitz on this list ALOT?!? So Pitz gets a 3 round jump, but Dan gets a difference making WR for his playoff push. Since the trade Gaffney had his bye week and then was able to join in on the beat up on the Chiefs for 11.7 points. Mike Wallace on the other hand has gone OFF! 17 and 25.6 points. Everyone knew Wallace would be better as the season went on and yet he was traded twice this season! Seems like a no brainer that Dan is the winner here, BUT HES NOT! Mike Wallace has been a cancer to Pitz's team all year. Since the trade Pitz is 2-0, coincidence?
Winner - Push
11/12/2010 - Pitz gets Thomas Jones and Dan's 10th round pick/Dan gets Cedric Benson and Pitz's 12 round pick
Dan and Pitz trade together a lot! Pitz will be finished drafting before the 12 round thanks to this deal, and Dan got what he views as an upgrade at the running back position. Did he though? As of right now Benson has 92.7 points to Jones' 79.3. Benson's schedule has BUF, NYJ, NO, PITT, CLE, SD, BAL to end the season, Jones on the other hand has ARI, SEA, DEN, SD, STL, TEN, OAK. Much easier stretch going into the playoffs. Seeing as how Pitz upgraded his draft status for a pretty even rb swap he gets this win in my book.
Winner - Pitz
Just as the tradedeadline has past so has this portion of the blog....RANKINGS BITCHES!
White Rice - Dan - Well Alec's run up top didn't last long. Dan took out all of his frustration from the Larsen loss on long time friend Stilt. Dan can thank Kyle Orton 27.74, Mike Wallace 25.6, Brandon Lloyd 21.00 and CJ2K 18.4 for a 125 point dick slap that will leave paint marks all over Stilts face for the draft next year. Did anyone else notice Tim Tebow playing at the end of the Broncos Chiefs game? Thanks McDaniels, you pull starters when your winning the blowout, but not losing. Yes I'm still not over my loss to Dan.
Velour Fog - Titus - "AND I WILL STRKE DOWN UPON THEE WITH GREAT VENGANCE AND FURRRRIOUS ANGER THOSE WHO WOULD ATTEMPT TO POISON AND DESTROY MY BROTHERS. AND YOU WILL KNOW I AM THE LORD WHEN I LAY MY VENGEANCE UPON THEE". Yes there were higher scores and larger differences in points but when two of the top three teams meet up and its just a massive beat down like saw, well yea I gotta throw the Pulp Fiction quote in here. Also if anyone missed it please look up the highlight that gave Jacksonville the win over the Texans. David Garrard throws up a hail mary that gets spiked right into the hands of Jacksonville receiver Mike Thomas. Who is Mike Thomas? Just some guy Titus picked up for this week and got him 22.7 points. You still think the Lord didn't have anything to do with this one?
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - Of course if Titus is Jules then Alec is Bret, the guy who gets shot up by Jules for "fucking Marsellus Wallace like a bitch". Rough rough week for Alec. Titus owned him in fantasy, and the Skins forgot to show up for the first half of Monday Night Football. Atleast the Skins locked up McNabb for 40 million (I know there are all kind of clauses now, but really what other franchise would have done what they did?). Maybe he gets his redemption in the playoffs?
Do You Like Apples? - Hittner - Soooooo close to doubling the total of his opponent! 126 points made Hittner the second highest scorer this week. Jamaal Charles, Peyton Hillis and MJD almost beat Jason single handed as they combined for 57.3 points. Roddy White joined in with 25.8 points, but I'm sure Hittner would love to give back at least 10 of those. I would love to talk about the difference that Aaron Rodgers made in this game, but he actually was on a bye! I wouldn't want to see this team any time soon.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Uh oh! The boat is sinking!!! 3 loses in a row and another playoff implication match this week verse Death. Wait ummm no jinx. Stilt is fine. Sooooo good. Not touching this any more, moving on! Good karma, good karma, good karma!!!
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Look at who is getting lucky now! Kirby went into the late game with a 4 point lead over Will who still had Hines Ward going. Ward gets a concussion and is not allowed to return after scoring....0 points. That lost could have been disastrous as Kirby has already lost to Jason and Pitz (who still had Mike Wallace on his team). The 4 o'clock games were quite nice to Kirby as he had Eli (22.62), D-Bowe (30.6), and Gore (21.4). 2 of those 3 players teams lost. Go garbage time points or in Frank Gore's case, overtime!
The Heaphopapotomus - Death - Bye week for Drew Brees. No backup quarterback. Vince Young injured. My choices Troy Smith, or Brett Favre. OF COURSE I TOOK TROY SMITH! A near 20 points later and I look like a genius. Steven Jackson finally scored a rushing touchdown and got me another 20 points, but week after week I think Dan Carpenter is becoming my mvp. Another double digit week from my kicker.
Face. - Peach - This matchup was really close going into Monday Night Football. Actually Peach was winning, AND had Desean Jackson on the 80 yard td to start the game! He did put it best when he pointed out he would never be happier to see a qb put up 50 points on him in fantasy. I believe him. I also believe he will be happy watching the Eagles in the playoffs since he probably won't be there for fantasy.
Gunners Treble - Big win verse Dan two weeks ago, but a let down performance this week against Death. Fitz is starting to heat up, and LT was able to pick up some extra points in the long overtime against the Browns. Matt Hasselbeck even looked promising until he injured his hand and let Charlie Whitehurst come in to play. This loss may have shut the door on Lar's season...so I want to talk about Charlie Whitehurst for a second. Has any 2nd string qb ever looked worse after having so much hype? Wait, yes, Jim Sorgi. Ah well Charlie Whitehurst sucks.
Just the Tip Drill - Pitz - Remember when he blew his team up looking towards next season and the draft? 2-0 since then and the happy owner of the Mike Vick experience that scored an amazing 49.32 points! This new squad ruined the excitement about Pitz/Jason this week. Sadly now it should just be a blowout and Pitz will get his 4th victory this season. It would be a great story if Pitz would make the playoffs, but it's probably fair to say that nobody wants to hear about this all off-season, especially since Pitz started making proclamations about being GM of the year. To me its kind of like congratulating somebody for beating their addiction with drugs. I mean yea its a good accomplishment and you should be proud, but why were you on crack to start with?
Crash and Burn - Will - That had to hurt. Despite his record Will has still been trying to win and after having a lot of his players blow up this week he had to think a win was coming his way. Knowshawn and Indy's D both had over 20 points which is a great start, but maybe next week Will will (tee hee) check and see if Mike Hart is going to play. Back to back weeks of starting an injured player is very Jasonish.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - Speak of the devil! I know for a fact Jason doesn't read this blog as I brought up to him the other day that I dedicated and entire introduction to him and he was clueless to what I was talking about. So who cares, this team is awful #1 overall pick is coming his way and I'm going to ramble for a second. Wolverine, dirty dipers, June 14, Pinky and the Brain, Community, Foghorn Leg Horn, Skippy peanut butter, R-Kelly's doo doo butter,Annie's boobs, pop tarts, lifevest, Hulk Hogan, Peter Parker, upside down pineapple cake, left hand turns, yellow, Timothy Dalton, Leon Hall, Big Bad Voodoo Daddies,1.21 jigawatts!!!!
Next week should be INTENSE as we inch closer and closer to seeing who is in the playoffs! We know Jason and Will have been eliminated, but nobody has technically clenched. Excited to see if anything else changes next week. Now you stay classy....PLANET EARTH!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Week 8
I want to thank everyone who is reading this blog right now. I would say there is a 98% chance you are in this league if you are reading this. If you are one of those people I would say there is a 100% chance you agree that this is the best league you have ever been in. Part of that reason is we have all known each other for a really long time, and are pretty good friends. I had the fortune to watch the majority of the games this Sunday with not only my good friend, but my opponent for this week, Jason Pack.
The day starts out well. Jason goes to the fridge and grabs a beer, he asks what game is on I tell him we are watching Redzone but we need to keep an eye on the Dolphins Bengals matchup. Of course Jason is fine with this, he is starting Chad Henne in fantasy, and after explaining to him that the Bengals are in our division hes now rooting against the Ravens rivals as well. We talk a little bit about the league and how he's not happy with his team and needs to make moves. Jason lets me know that he has been eyeing Steven Jackson. Right there, on the spot he offers me a third round pick in next years draft for what was the 15th overall pick last year and my second highest scorer currently. I quickly decline only for Jason to shoot out his next offer, "well, how about for Drew Brees?" I simply laugh at this request and go back to checking the fantasy scores. It should come as no surprise that I had been refreshing Yahoo's fantasy page every break in action, trying to keep up with the days scores. Some time in the second half of the 1 o'clock games I celebrate a 10 yard run from Jahvid Best (pretty sure it was his last touch of the day), which sparks a question from Jason "who am I playing today?" "Me you jackass!" We go back to watching football, rooting for our respective players and anything that I deem as positive for the Ravens (Cinci losing, Packers over Jets, ect). The 4 o'clock games start and I have a pretty healthy lead. The Chargers are driving and hand the ball off to Ryan Mathews who gets stopped at the 1 after a 9 yard gain. Next play is a hand off to Mike Tolbert, Jason's starting runningback, for a touchdown. I turn my head expecting to hear a bunch of smack only to find Jason asleep on the couch. He wakes up in time for us to watch the end of the 4 o'clock games and we get to see how Mike Tolbert is going off. Well I watched as Tolbert is killing my lead, Jason continues to cruse Scott for his terrible drafting and that he now only has backups on his team. Jason leaves before the prime time game and I'm holding on to a 64.2 to 48.38 lead. Going into the late game Jason has Marques Colston and his MVP this year Pittsburgh's defense while I'm running out my #1 pick Drew Brees (who is only worth a third round pick after keepers to some people). The first half doesn't go very well for me and Drew as I keep watching my lead over Jason dwindle. Then it happened, Drew throws an interception and ProtectYourNeck is only down by 3 points! Like clockwork my phone rings. Of course it's Jason ready to talk shit. I answer and he asks me if I'm watching "this". I do my best to be optimistic, but all I can think about is that I'm going to lose to this guy. Jason is a gimme, and I'm going to blow it (sorry Kirby). Jason goes back to talking about the game telling me "I'm pumped, been waiting to watch this show for awhile now." Show? What the hell is he watching? "The Walking Dead! I told you about this show! Why aren't you watching this?" Jason football and the World Series is on. "Oh right you and sports all the time." ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? YOU JUST CUT IT TO 3 POINTS IN FANTASY! "Whatever. Ok I'm going back to this. Talk to you later." Well after that the fantasy gods felt sorry for me and made my Halloween wish come true. The Saints and the Heaphopopotamus win and Jason and the Steelers lose. Merry Halloween everyone, lets get to the rankings!
(Please note that most of what I quoted was not exact verbatim. There were moments when I went into shock talking to him and frankly forgot the exact words he used. So in advance Jason I am sorry for not getting what you said exactly right. I would worry about him complaining, but I don't think he actually reads these.)
White Rice - Dan - Always exciting when it comes down to Monday night! Dan was very quiet during the game, but was very quick to remind all of us how much his Arian Foster mancrush has grown. Foster provided Dan with 22.7 points, and if you add that to Brandon Lloyd's 22.9 and he would have beaten Will's total for the week. Sprinkle in solid performances from Kyle Orton (17.56) and shocker Chris Johnson (14.3) and its no surprise Dan was right up there for top scorer. The Empire Strikes Back....
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - The only other 7-1 team was able to put up the largest total of the week, against the last place team. Talk about overkill. Adrian Peterson lead the way with 20.2 points, but Alec had plenty of double digit performers. Sebastian Janikowski who leads all kickers in scoring, came through with big performance putting up a 16 spot for the all of a sudden offensive juggernaut Oakland Raiders. We give a lot of the praise to Dan for his teams dominance, but if you look, Alec is only 16 points back. This will be interesting down the stretch.
Velour Fog - Titus - Not even Matthew Staffords mother was as excited as Titus was to see MattStaff back in for the Lions. Calvin Johnson is loving life again. Matt drops back looks to his left and chucks the ball up to his favorite toy. Calvin was one of the big scorers this week as he put up 28.1 points! Yes I'm salty Jahvid Best didnt get rolling...again...but after the performance Johnson had this week I'm hoping opposing defenses drop back both safeties and open up those running lanes. In that optimism I'm naming Calvin Johnson as the pimp player of the week.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Ok ok ok I get it. You went away on vacation. Fine. But did you have to give away a victory to Kirby? A guy I'm tied with for the last playoff spot? I know Hittner agrees...and I'm sure some of the guys below us would have hoped you would have been playing them the week you wanted to say F it. True story, Stilt's bench outscored his starters. He may wanna set the roster for his match up with Titus this week.
nephew w/ out the n - Kirby - You lucky bastard. Yes I know that you scored 95 points, but I'm going to assume you would have lost if Stilt had started his team correctly and you would be behind me and Hittner and not in the way you would like. It will be interesting to see how Kirby handles the whole Randy Moss thing.* I know his team has done well this season even with him being pretty quiet, but that is still a big loss for any team just when you think about what Moss can do on any given Sunday. Big big big big matchup vrs Alec next Sunday.
*Well that was written last night and I think we all know how the Moss situation is being handled. It basically got Boldin from Pitz and prevented me from obtaining him. Awesome.
Do You Like Apples? - Hittner - Apples are hit or miss, but he does like loans! The story about this team changed dramatically yesterday afternoon when Hittner made the biggest deal to date, trading for the loan of Aaron Rodgers for the rest of the year. Schaub was serviceable throughout the season, but the Monday Night let down must not have sat well in the Hittner camp as it lead to a crucial loss to Dan. With Rodgers manning the helm now this team does not appear to have a weakness anywhere in the lineup. There are some injury concerns on the bench (Britt and Floyd) but he does have plenty of depth on his team, and really injuries to your bench are never what prevents you from winning. What can prevent you from winning is how the fantasy gods view your actions. Do the gods approve of the loan? We will see shortly...
Heaphopopotamus - Death - It's really not that hard to spell. If I can spell it anyone can.
Heap-hop-O-pot-a-mus. You'll never forget it, just like I will never forget the week that my free agent pick up at the kicker spot got me 19 points and won the week for me. Everyone not named Drew Brees underperformed this week and so Dan Carpenter drilled 5 field goals to carry me to victory. I used to love GOOOOOOULD, but now I can do with out the bling. Think about it. We are all worried about the fantasy gods and how they view our team. I had a kicker named "Gould" which of course makes you think of greed and false idols, I dropped my former kicker for a "Carpenter" and I get the win with a huge performance from him. Is he Jesus? I can't say for sure, but he will be starting for me this week vrs the Ravens.
Face. - Peach - Peach's score this week would have beaten Will and Stilt (who didn't set his line up). Awful. Peyton scored 19 points and while he continues to be succesful this team continues to struggle. At some point Peach will have to realize hes an idiot and took the wrong player with the first overall pick. I really can't drag out too much more from this other than Stilt's bench would have beaten Peach this week.
Gunners Treble - Lars - Big fall this week with the loss to Titus. In a game that had huge playoff implications Lars lost by 16 points, and started a QB, RB, and DEF who didn't play this week. Good management. With the moves that are being made by teams in the middle of the pack I don't think I see Lars making the late playoff push, you know since he won't even set his team correctly. Lars faces White Rice this week, and it may be the last matchup of any significance for him this season.
crash and burn - Will - Yup. The name pretty much described this week. Will just set a new record for all time worse week score. The mark was previously held by Pitz back in week 4 when he scored a pitiful 46.44 points. Now that Will has traded away Aaron Rodgers, the ground is the limit for just how bad his team can be.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - I have already covered Jason a lot this week so I'm not going to spend too much more time on this team. I will point out week 11; ProtectYourNeck vrs Chaos Theory. Mark your calenders.
Chaos Theory - Pitz - Pitz would have beaten 4 teams this week, unfortunately he lost to 1. Big swing in the record books. Let's not talk about what Pitz has the least in (wins), lets talk about what he is leading this league in and that's roster moves. As of 10:53am on 11/3/10 Pitz has made 24 moves to his team, 7 more then the next highest total (Hittner, 17). Can't say the kid isn't trying, it's just not working. Remember going into your draft next year, always beat on the Bengals and Cardinals. There is no way those franchises can be bad!
Ok this is going to be a great weekend with fantasy and a large number of us seeing Tosh on Saturday night. With that in mind I say good bye, and stay tuned for more "Shorties watching Shorties".
The day starts out well. Jason goes to the fridge and grabs a beer, he asks what game is on I tell him we are watching Redzone but we need to keep an eye on the Dolphins Bengals matchup. Of course Jason is fine with this, he is starting Chad Henne in fantasy, and after explaining to him that the Bengals are in our division hes now rooting against the Ravens rivals as well. We talk a little bit about the league and how he's not happy with his team and needs to make moves. Jason lets me know that he has been eyeing Steven Jackson. Right there, on the spot he offers me a third round pick in next years draft for what was the 15th overall pick last year and my second highest scorer currently. I quickly decline only for Jason to shoot out his next offer, "well, how about for Drew Brees?" I simply laugh at this request and go back to checking the fantasy scores. It should come as no surprise that I had been refreshing Yahoo's fantasy page every break in action, trying to keep up with the days scores. Some time in the second half of the 1 o'clock games I celebrate a 10 yard run from Jahvid Best (pretty sure it was his last touch of the day), which sparks a question from Jason "who am I playing today?" "Me you jackass!" We go back to watching football, rooting for our respective players and anything that I deem as positive for the Ravens (Cinci losing, Packers over Jets, ect). The 4 o'clock games start and I have a pretty healthy lead. The Chargers are driving and hand the ball off to Ryan Mathews who gets stopped at the 1 after a 9 yard gain. Next play is a hand off to Mike Tolbert, Jason's starting runningback, for a touchdown. I turn my head expecting to hear a bunch of smack only to find Jason asleep on the couch. He wakes up in time for us to watch the end of the 4 o'clock games and we get to see how Mike Tolbert is going off. Well I watched as Tolbert is killing my lead, Jason continues to cruse Scott for his terrible drafting and that he now only has backups on his team. Jason leaves before the prime time game and I'm holding on to a 64.2 to 48.38 lead. Going into the late game Jason has Marques Colston and his MVP this year Pittsburgh's defense while I'm running out my #1 pick Drew Brees (who is only worth a third round pick after keepers to some people). The first half doesn't go very well for me and Drew as I keep watching my lead over Jason dwindle. Then it happened, Drew throws an interception and ProtectYourNeck is only down by 3 points! Like clockwork my phone rings. Of course it's Jason ready to talk shit. I answer and he asks me if I'm watching "this". I do my best to be optimistic, but all I can think about is that I'm going to lose to this guy. Jason is a gimme, and I'm going to blow it (sorry Kirby). Jason goes back to talking about the game telling me "I'm pumped, been waiting to watch this show for awhile now." Show? What the hell is he watching? "The Walking Dead! I told you about this show! Why aren't you watching this?" Jason football and the World Series is on. "Oh right you and sports all the time." ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? YOU JUST CUT IT TO 3 POINTS IN FANTASY! "Whatever. Ok I'm going back to this. Talk to you later." Well after that the fantasy gods felt sorry for me and made my Halloween wish come true. The Saints and the Heaphopopotamus win and Jason and the Steelers lose. Merry Halloween everyone, lets get to the rankings!
(Please note that most of what I quoted was not exact verbatim. There were moments when I went into shock talking to him and frankly forgot the exact words he used. So in advance Jason I am sorry for not getting what you said exactly right. I would worry about him complaining, but I don't think he actually reads these.)
White Rice - Dan - Always exciting when it comes down to Monday night! Dan was very quiet during the game, but was very quick to remind all of us how much his Arian Foster mancrush has grown. Foster provided Dan with 22.7 points, and if you add that to Brandon Lloyd's 22.9 and he would have beaten Will's total for the week. Sprinkle in solid performances from Kyle Orton (17.56) and shocker Chris Johnson (14.3) and its no surprise Dan was right up there for top scorer. The Empire Strikes Back....
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - The only other 7-1 team was able to put up the largest total of the week, against the last place team. Talk about overkill. Adrian Peterson lead the way with 20.2 points, but Alec had plenty of double digit performers. Sebastian Janikowski who leads all kickers in scoring, came through with big performance putting up a 16 spot for the all of a sudden offensive juggernaut Oakland Raiders. We give a lot of the praise to Dan for his teams dominance, but if you look, Alec is only 16 points back. This will be interesting down the stretch.
Velour Fog - Titus - Not even Matthew Staffords mother was as excited as Titus was to see MattStaff back in for the Lions. Calvin Johnson is loving life again. Matt drops back looks to his left and chucks the ball up to his favorite toy. Calvin was one of the big scorers this week as he put up 28.1 points! Yes I'm salty Jahvid Best didnt get rolling...again...but after the performance Johnson had this week I'm hoping opposing defenses drop back both safeties and open up those running lanes. In that optimism I'm naming Calvin Johnson as the pimp player of the week.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - Ok ok ok I get it. You went away on vacation. Fine. But did you have to give away a victory to Kirby? A guy I'm tied with for the last playoff spot? I know Hittner agrees...and I'm sure some of the guys below us would have hoped you would have been playing them the week you wanted to say F it. True story, Stilt's bench outscored his starters. He may wanna set the roster for his match up with Titus this week.
nephew w/ out the n - Kirby - You lucky bastard. Yes I know that you scored 95 points, but I'm going to assume you would have lost if Stilt had started his team correctly and you would be behind me and Hittner and not in the way you would like. It will be interesting to see how Kirby handles the whole Randy Moss thing.* I know his team has done well this season even with him being pretty quiet, but that is still a big loss for any team just when you think about what Moss can do on any given Sunday. Big big big big matchup vrs Alec next Sunday.
*Well that was written last night and I think we all know how the Moss situation is being handled. It basically got Boldin from Pitz and prevented me from obtaining him. Awesome.
Do You Like Apples? - Hittner - Apples are hit or miss, but he does like loans! The story about this team changed dramatically yesterday afternoon when Hittner made the biggest deal to date, trading for the loan of Aaron Rodgers for the rest of the year. Schaub was serviceable throughout the season, but the Monday Night let down must not have sat well in the Hittner camp as it lead to a crucial loss to Dan. With Rodgers manning the helm now this team does not appear to have a weakness anywhere in the lineup. There are some injury concerns on the bench (Britt and Floyd) but he does have plenty of depth on his team, and really injuries to your bench are never what prevents you from winning. What can prevent you from winning is how the fantasy gods view your actions. Do the gods approve of the loan? We will see shortly...
Heaphopopotamus - Death - It's really not that hard to spell. If I can spell it anyone can.
Heap-hop-O-pot-a-mus. You'll never forget it, just like I will never forget the week that my free agent pick up at the kicker spot got me 19 points and won the week for me. Everyone not named Drew Brees underperformed this week and so Dan Carpenter drilled 5 field goals to carry me to victory. I used to love GOOOOOOULD, but now I can do with out the bling. Think about it. We are all worried about the fantasy gods and how they view our team. I had a kicker named "Gould" which of course makes you think of greed and false idols, I dropped my former kicker for a "Carpenter" and I get the win with a huge performance from him. Is he Jesus? I can't say for sure, but he will be starting for me this week vrs the Ravens.
Face. - Peach - Peach's score this week would have beaten Will and Stilt (who didn't set his line up). Awful. Peyton scored 19 points and while he continues to be succesful this team continues to struggle. At some point Peach will have to realize hes an idiot and took the wrong player with the first overall pick. I really can't drag out too much more from this other than Stilt's bench would have beaten Peach this week.
Gunners Treble - Lars - Big fall this week with the loss to Titus. In a game that had huge playoff implications Lars lost by 16 points, and started a QB, RB, and DEF who didn't play this week. Good management. With the moves that are being made by teams in the middle of the pack I don't think I see Lars making the late playoff push, you know since he won't even set his team correctly. Lars faces White Rice this week, and it may be the last matchup of any significance for him this season.
crash and burn - Will - Yup. The name pretty much described this week. Will just set a new record for all time worse week score. The mark was previously held by Pitz back in week 4 when he scored a pitiful 46.44 points. Now that Will has traded away Aaron Rodgers, the ground is the limit for just how bad his team can be.
ProtectYourNeck - Jason - I have already covered Jason a lot this week so I'm not going to spend too much more time on this team. I will point out week 11; ProtectYourNeck vrs Chaos Theory. Mark your calenders.
Chaos Theory - Pitz - Pitz would have beaten 4 teams this week, unfortunately he lost to 1. Big swing in the record books. Let's not talk about what Pitz has the least in (wins), lets talk about what he is leading this league in and that's roster moves. As of 10:53am on 11/3/10 Pitz has made 24 moves to his team, 7 more then the next highest total (Hittner, 17). Can't say the kid isn't trying, it's just not working. Remember going into your draft next year, always beat on the Bengals and Cardinals. There is no way those franchises can be bad!
Ok this is going to be a great weekend with fantasy and a large number of us seeing Tosh on Saturday night. With that in mind I say good bye, and stay tuned for more "Shorties watching Shorties".
Friday, October 29, 2010
Week 7
Ok, so it took me a lot longer to get started on this weeks blog. Partly was because I had a lot of really fun things going on during the early part of the week, and the other...well I was still angry. If you haven't heard my sob story yet here goes. All games are over with the exception of the Raiders Broncos. If you have no idea what happened, I'll tell you. The Raiders MURDERED the Broncos. 57 points from the Raiders this week. Well with all other games done with the exception of this one I was beating Dan by 5 points (give or take, just go with me here for the sake of the story). 3 minutes left in the game. Redzone switches over and what do i see? All of the Broncos starters are still in the game! They are down by over 40 points!!! The Raiders? Well all of their players have been benched (including my Zach Miller who had 12.5 points in 2 quarters of playing time). Kyle Orton completes a 42 yard pass to Brandon Lloyd putting Dan 1 point ahead of me. The ball is on the goal and I realize i may have a chance yet. If Orton throws a pick here I still win! First down is a handoff for no gain. Second down drop back fade to no one. Third down play action throw across the middle TIPPED! Lands in between two Raider players. Forth down another pass is broken up but nobody wearing black and silver is there to snatch it. That's it. I lost. Everyone has thousands of stories like this. Its fantasy football you have no control over it. I didn't regret picking up Kansas City, they got me 14 points. Sure the Bears who I dropped scored 17.5, but I went with a matchup I liked more and it didn't blow up in my face. I went with Mason in the flex spot. Heap got 17.5 and Mason broke a finger. If Mason catches one more pass I win. But injuries happen. Drew Brees lost me 10 points due to his turnovers all damn day. Am I really going to blame Brees? No, there was something else here. I was mad not because I lost, but because of who I lost to. Dan! By the time South Park came on Wednesday night it hit me. Dan is the villain of this league. Nobody minds that Alec and Stilt have the same record, but everyone wants to see Dan lose. Why is this? Is it because Peach screwed up the whole draft and gave him Chris Johnson? Is it because he probably drinks out of the trophy mug as he thinks its already his? Is it because he brags about drafting Arian Foster late? Is it because he created Fifagate and has shown no remorse to ending Pitz's chance of being competitive in this league? Is it because he told me to go home and finish up the blog in response to an apologetic email?
Well, yes. Yes to all of them (maybe not the mug thing. I have no proof). Dan is the Yankees, the Duke, the Cowboys of this league, just without the legacy. Nobody wants to see him win this. Is it good for the league? Of course it is. There is a rooting interest to see him not finish in the money. Everyone wants to see him hand the trophy off someone else later this year! It's like this years World Series. The casual fan wants to see Texas and San Fran win. Had the Yankees been playing there is a villain to root against. Dan is like Darth Vader, and hopefully at the end of this season just like the end of Return of the Jedi, Dan will come back to the good side.
White Rice - Dan - See above. I can say no more.
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - Clever pun sent to Peach. What did the hand say to the face? Get it! Peach's team name is face, and Alec slapped him silly with 115 points. The Grabbers were the highest scoring team of the week with big games from his Vikings Adrian Peterson (23.2) and Percy Harvin (16.6). As impressive as those two were, the co-MVPs for Alec this week is Jay Cutler and Deangelo Hall. Jay was having a blast throw pick after pick to the once over hyped corner who has seemed to find a home in Washington's D. CJ Spiller had a terrible week, which is a bit surprising, he was the only player on the Bills not to have success against the Ravens.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - You motor boating sonofabitch. Just when we started assuming this team wasn't going to be able to keep fighting off the opposition and stay atop the standings, but here we are half way there and Stilt still is tied for the best record in the league. Matt Ryan had a field day against the Bengals and brought home 25 points for the motor boaters. Stilt also had some big performances from rookie Dez Bryant (23.4), seemingly rejuvinated (as Kirby and Will hate) Brandon Jacobs (11.5) and a good recent pick up Davone Bess (12.6). I still think this team isn't built for a strong showing in the playoffs, but I think Stilt wants us all to say that and let him continue to be the underdog who is 6-1.
Velour Fog - Titus - RunDMC had a great day scoring 43.6 points for Titus.....except he was on his bench! Am I going to rip into him for making such a poor decision? Absolutely not. Week two I left Jahvid Best on the bench and its been haunting me since. Have you looked at Titus' lineup for this week? I'll tell you, hes starting RunDMC this week. This was a big loss for Titus as the big 4 became the big 3 after this week's defeat to Hittner. The time for Ray Rice to prove his worth as the number 5 overall pick needs to start this week....only problem he is on the bench. Titus has to be rooting hard for another "tricky" performance from RunDMC. (That's just great writing right there!)
Do You Like Apples? - Hittner - This team is just catching fire right now! Is Hittner the one we can all rally behind this week? The only fantasy team I've seen that features fruit in its title seems to be making a run at a title all its own. After the latest victory Hittner has won 4 of his last 5 match ups. Looking over his roster you have to like him continuing his good fortune. Roddy White is loving Matt Ryan's tunnel vision, Jamaal Charles is getting more touches, and Matt Schaub should be throwing to a healthier Andre Johnson. Don't look now but Kenny Britt has scored in his last 4 starts! Oh right the Kenny Britt guy, dont feel too bad for Titus, Hittner benched Britt this week and he only scored 40.5 points this week. Not bad.
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Big big big big win for Kirbo. With this win he leapfrogs over a number of us and finds himself sitting in a playoff position. There has never been a question about this teams ability to score points and we saw that again this week as team FU put up 112 spot on Lars. Looking up and down the roster and this was an impressive showing for Kirbs. His lowest scorer was Randy Moss and he scored 9 points! I am also going to have to point out that Dwayne Bowe has now taken over total points from Wes Welker after another 20 point week. I dont regret the trade at all....but damnit...
Gunners Treble - Larsen - Lars is now 1-2 over the last 3 weeks, and his one victory came at the hands of Pitz. Fortunately Lars already owns Fifa. There is a lot not to like about this team. For starters who is the quarterback of this team? Both players Lars have will not be playing this week. I do like his runningbacks featuring Micheal Turner and LaDainian Tomlinson, but I think his receivers are just too inconsistent. Catch him on a good week and he will make you pay, but the longer this season goes I think we will see this team is not a true contender.
TheHeaphopopotamus - Death - Jahvid Best says the turf toe is 100% behind him. That plus Matthew Stafford's return makes me optimistic moving forward.
Face. - Peach - Scoring almost 100 points and still getting crushed has to be a miserable feeling. This defeat was the second in a row to Peach and has to get him to start scratching his head about what he has to do to get to the postseason. DJax head injury may become a bit of a problem if it turns out he is going to miss an extended period of time, since Lance Moore is such a question mark regarding his production. What is not a question mark is the performance of Ryan Torain. Torain has been a great addition to this team, even though it costed a very talented Jeremy Maclin, and right now is the lone bright spot for Peach. Oh and Peyton Manning. Idiot.
Crash and Burn - Will - Make that two wins now for Will. Will cracks the 100 point mark for the week and can even look to getting back to back wins as he takes on Pitz next week. No surprise here that Aaron Rodgers was one of the leading points getters for Will. I'm surprised that when he was looking for a team name he didnt name this team "Thank God for Aaron Rodgers". As good as Rodgers has been you can obviously see that he can't do it on his own. No he had help. This weeks Pimp Power Player is Knowshon Moreno. Knowshon was the loan positive for the Broncos as they got whooped by the Raiders this Sunday. Knowshon brought home 21 points and lead Will to his victory. The best part about this was that Alec originally had Moreno, but wasnt willing to deal with the hamstring injuries any longer and Will jumped on the opportunity to pick him up. Good waiver management deserves good things. Will, enjoy the victory.
ProtectYourNeck -Jason - 90 points this week actually worries me a bit about seeing him next week. Fortunately I wont have to worry about Joe Flacco who scored just under 20 points who will be on a bye. He has made some moves that is starting to give this team a bit of his own identity, and he played this week with 0 people on a bye week in his starting lineup. If you ask me that's just as good as a win in Jason's book.
Chaos Theory - Pitz - New name, same outcome. Trade deadline is Nov 12. I would talk to Pitz if there is a player you are looking for and a draft pick you're willing to part with. Sad but true.
See ya next time Space Cowboy!
Well, yes. Yes to all of them (maybe not the mug thing. I have no proof). Dan is the Yankees, the Duke, the Cowboys of this league, just without the legacy. Nobody wants to see him win this. Is it good for the league? Of course it is. There is a rooting interest to see him not finish in the money. Everyone wants to see him hand the trophy off someone else later this year! It's like this years World Series. The casual fan wants to see Texas and San Fran win. Had the Yankees been playing there is a villain to root against. Dan is like Darth Vader, and hopefully at the end of this season just like the end of Return of the Jedi, Dan will come back to the good side.
White Rice - Dan - See above. I can say no more.
Grundy Grabbers - Alec - Clever pun sent to Peach. What did the hand say to the face? Get it! Peach's team name is face, and Alec slapped him silly with 115 points. The Grabbers were the highest scoring team of the week with big games from his Vikings Adrian Peterson (23.2) and Percy Harvin (16.6). As impressive as those two were, the co-MVPs for Alec this week is Jay Cutler and Deangelo Hall. Jay was having a blast throw pick after pick to the once over hyped corner who has seemed to find a home in Washington's D. CJ Spiller had a terrible week, which is a bit surprising, he was the only player on the Bills not to have success against the Ravens.
Motor Boaters - Stilt - You motor boating sonofabitch. Just when we started assuming this team wasn't going to be able to keep fighting off the opposition and stay atop the standings, but here we are half way there and Stilt still is tied for the best record in the league. Matt Ryan had a field day against the Bengals and brought home 25 points for the motor boaters. Stilt also had some big performances from rookie Dez Bryant (23.4), seemingly rejuvinated (as Kirby and Will hate) Brandon Jacobs (11.5) and a good recent pick up Davone Bess (12.6). I still think this team isn't built for a strong showing in the playoffs, but I think Stilt wants us all to say that and let him continue to be the underdog who is 6-1.
Velour Fog - Titus - RunDMC had a great day scoring 43.6 points for Titus.....except he was on his bench! Am I going to rip into him for making such a poor decision? Absolutely not. Week two I left Jahvid Best on the bench and its been haunting me since. Have you looked at Titus' lineup for this week? I'll tell you, hes starting RunDMC this week. This was a big loss for Titus as the big 4 became the big 3 after this week's defeat to Hittner. The time for Ray Rice to prove his worth as the number 5 overall pick needs to start this week....only problem he is on the bench. Titus has to be rooting hard for another "tricky" performance from RunDMC. (That's just great writing right there!)
Do You Like Apples? - Hittner - This team is just catching fire right now! Is Hittner the one we can all rally behind this week? The only fantasy team I've seen that features fruit in its title seems to be making a run at a title all its own. After the latest victory Hittner has won 4 of his last 5 match ups. Looking over his roster you have to like him continuing his good fortune. Roddy White is loving Matt Ryan's tunnel vision, Jamaal Charles is getting more touches, and Matt Schaub should be throwing to a healthier Andre Johnson. Don't look now but Kenny Britt has scored in his last 4 starts! Oh right the Kenny Britt guy, dont feel too bad for Titus, Hittner benched Britt this week and he only scored 40.5 points this week. Not bad.
nephew w/out the n - Kirby - Big big big big win for Kirbo. With this win he leapfrogs over a number of us and finds himself sitting in a playoff position. There has never been a question about this teams ability to score points and we saw that again this week as team FU put up 112 spot on Lars. Looking up and down the roster and this was an impressive showing for Kirbs. His lowest scorer was Randy Moss and he scored 9 points! I am also going to have to point out that Dwayne Bowe has now taken over total points from Wes Welker after another 20 point week. I dont regret the trade at all....but damnit...
Gunners Treble - Larsen - Lars is now 1-2 over the last 3 weeks, and his one victory came at the hands of Pitz. Fortunately Lars already owns Fifa. There is a lot not to like about this team. For starters who is the quarterback of this team? Both players Lars have will not be playing this week. I do like his runningbacks featuring Micheal Turner and LaDainian Tomlinson, but I think his receivers are just too inconsistent. Catch him on a good week and he will make you pay, but the longer this season goes I think we will see this team is not a true contender.
TheHeaphopopotamus - Death - Jahvid Best says the turf toe is 100% behind him. That plus Matthew Stafford's return makes me optimistic moving forward.
Face. - Peach - Scoring almost 100 points and still getting crushed has to be a miserable feeling. This defeat was the second in a row to Peach and has to get him to start scratching his head about what he has to do to get to the postseason. DJax head injury may become a bit of a problem if it turns out he is going to miss an extended period of time, since Lance Moore is such a question mark regarding his production. What is not a question mark is the performance of Ryan Torain. Torain has been a great addition to this team, even though it costed a very talented Jeremy Maclin, and right now is the lone bright spot for Peach. Oh and Peyton Manning. Idiot.
Crash and Burn - Will - Make that two wins now for Will. Will cracks the 100 point mark for the week and can even look to getting back to back wins as he takes on Pitz next week. No surprise here that Aaron Rodgers was one of the leading points getters for Will. I'm surprised that when he was looking for a team name he didnt name this team "Thank God for Aaron Rodgers". As good as Rodgers has been you can obviously see that he can't do it on his own. No he had help. This weeks Pimp Power Player is Knowshon Moreno. Knowshon was the loan positive for the Broncos as they got whooped by the Raiders this Sunday. Knowshon brought home 21 points and lead Will to his victory. The best part about this was that Alec originally had Moreno, but wasnt willing to deal with the hamstring injuries any longer and Will jumped on the opportunity to pick him up. Good waiver management deserves good things. Will, enjoy the victory.
ProtectYourNeck -Jason - 90 points this week actually worries me a bit about seeing him next week. Fortunately I wont have to worry about Joe Flacco who scored just under 20 points who will be on a bye. He has made some moves that is starting to give this team a bit of his own identity, and he played this week with 0 people on a bye week in his starting lineup. If you ask me that's just as good as a win in Jason's book.
Chaos Theory - Pitz - New name, same outcome. Trade deadline is Nov 12. I would talk to Pitz if there is a player you are looking for and a draft pick you're willing to part with. Sad but true.
See ya next time Space Cowboy!
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